All entries for Tuesday 21 February 2006

February 21, 2006

It would be the right time to walk each our own way…...

Everything is going to be finished….....or I rather feel, everybody seem to finish them…....

I still feel the day of leaving is far away, and still I've got enough time…..or, nothing has changed around me. I haven't even started packing…. My room is as same as usual…..Well, recently I frequently heard my friends was going to have last something…...They always put 'the last'.......
By saying so, I felt like they are trying to finish everything they have touched, they havce met, they have loved…...

I can't behave in the way. Nothing has changed …...well, some of my international friends kindly invite me to dinner or lunch. So actually, I also feel the end is not just there, but created by the other people and every other stuffs.

The goal is not just coming, but for them, they are going to the goal

I don't know which is good…...but I feel sad when I see the other is running (I feel in this way; not walking to) to the end of the day. In addition, everybody seem to be changed a lot, even compared with just a few weeks ago. I know they are busy to looking to their next dream, so we should greatly welcome those fact. In deed, I'm also heading to my dream; I now startd reading some textbook and papers associated with my interest and possible topic I'll do as my dissertation.

To be honest, around myself the pass rate of the time is quite slow as far as my nerves feels, but the time in my friends seem to run faster…..for they are really hurrying to do anything. They always talk about that they are busy, they have to finish something…..

I don't know 2 and half weeks is short or not…....Well, some are leaving in week 9, so it's almost in 10 days….

At night I heard that we were just going to drink in Varsity with some of my frirend, but it's also my and Yuko's birthday party!! Some gave me presents and a message card!! It's really happy to be hold the party, and indeed, almost all of JYA and also Rita and Emily came to see us!! I'm really a happy man as many came for my party!!
But…..I'm also sad to be honest…...
I know I'm quite selfish and I of course know the other people have their own thing to be done. They can't spare their time fully only my and Yuko's party…..but…….....I'm really selfish and childish…...
Some have left in the mid-time of the party…...
Well, some were still be with us until we left the Varsity. It's really fun to talk with my great friends!! I really want to make much more memories we spend the time together~ the easiest but the best thing we can do now.

We are starting to walk on each way heading their shinning future…..tooooo bright to look into clearly…...

By the way, I have read an amount of textbooks and papers from last week as I said to today, then I checked it today, then noticed if summed up all, I've done more than 250 pages of textbook and some papers about Quantum Field Theory. In addition, I've read some scientific magazines (Scientific American and NewScientist), though of course not all the pages but only the parts I'm interested in.

Well…...250 pages is just one fifth or much less…..for I have two textbooks: Quantum Field Theory by Michio Kaku and Relativistic Quantum Fields by Bjorken and Drell. 200 pages of former one (out of 750 pages) and 50 pages (out of 400 pages) of the latter one…...

Um….still on the middle, but I think I can be proud of myself a bit??

February 2006

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