All entries for January 2007

January 28, 2007

My mum is talking to a fish

My mum is talking to a fish. Not just any fish, the fish she’d bought this morning in the market, the fish that’s still alive, breathing and swimming in the kitchen sink filled with water. Make no mistake thinking that she’s trying to spill her soul to the fish. She’s trying to kill the fish, but the fish wouldn’t give in. So my mum decided to use her famous motherly tactic and lecture the fish on how it was born to serve as food, and that it should accept its destiny and stop trying to escape my mum’s strong hands and the sharp blade of the butcher’s knife she’s holding. However, after cutting the fish’s stomach open and removing all its intestines my mum discovered that the fish is still very much alive and protesting against its cruel fate. Failing the lecture tactic, she started shouting at the fish, hoping to gain its understanding through stronger vibrations in the air caused by a louder tone of voice. The fish was still jerking in the sink, emptied, skinned, but still breathing and loathing that day it was caught into the silver fishnets of the fisher. Failing to deliver the “it’s nothing personal, you are just my food and you should accept it” message, my mum started heating up the wok with sizzling oil, dried red pepper, a pinch of salt and slices of ginger. I like to think that the fish had let out a cry of desperation before it went into the wok, still very much alive and kicking. I also like to think it was a beautiful story commemorating the sacrificial death of this fish I’m laying chopsticks on this moment.

January 24, 2007


Writing about web page

it’s a beautiful day to share! i’ll definitely make a microdoc when i get some free time. just need to decide on a topic…

In defence of agnostics

I’m an agnostic. This statement puts frowns on the faces of religiously-conscious people. They, and just about everyone else perceive agnostics as people who simply can’t make up their minds. Well, we can’t. But the question I’m stuck with is not ‘Is there God?’ It is ‘Why god?’ why do I even have to occupy my mind pondering if there is a god? And most importantly, what’s the point of god? Some people live their lives, very much happy lives without ever having to even think about whether god exists. It’s like staring at a banana wondering if it has a soul and if it should be worshipped. How many of us have done that? Very, very few. How is god different from the soul of a banana? A phantom creature that may or may not exist, whose existence really doesn’t matter, creating a dilemma for the ostensibly smart humankind, causing wars and atrocities and major mass delusion – how did we come to this?

Being agnostic for me means I don’t believe in god simply because I don’t see a purpose in god, but at the same time all of my orifices are being penetrated with daily discussions in the media and in the community about god or no-god. So I’m stuck here waiting for someone to prove to me that there is a point in god, because going back to being religion-free is no longer an option in this world.

So really no one gets to call agnostics names, because those people waving their finger around are either the ones who can’t come up with a compelling reason to create a god and believe in it, or the ones that think they have become immune to talks of religion, who are really actually bothered by the existence of the phantom ‘god’ because they spend hours thinking about how god doesn’t exist.

Anyway, if there was only one single clan of people believing in god and no opponent to that, us, the agnostics, wouldn’t have to choose between the two. And whoever said you have to choose? You can be conscious, aware of both sides of the debate without having to join in the mud fight. After all, the social scientists studying subcultures don’t always become one of the representatives of the subculture they study. Why does there need to be a choice. Okay, so you believe in god and you are an atheist, how does that affect me?! If I’m truly not interested in the debate, why do I still have to take sides? Why do I get called names for saying I honestly couldn’t care less if god exists.

So, next time you hear someone saying that agnostics are pathetic, just be assured that the person uttering this is most likely one of those who’s too arrogant to acknowledge that the god-debate has already had an effect in his/her life, or one of those who’s too stupid to prove the existence and purpose of god. I don’t think god would be mad at someone who wants proof and wants to believe in the actual physical evidence; neither do I think it’ll be too late to convert when/if god’s existence is actually proven. The thing I care least about is whether god exists. There’s plenty of other things to define a person and religion is the least appealing of all.

a treasure to share – Jelly Roll Morton – The Crave, sheet music

Writing about web page

Soundtrack from film La leggenda del pianista sull’oceano

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