June 10, 2007

the war of sexes

I’m not entitled to being in a mood. I’m a woman, and hence all my feelings are, apparently, hormone-driven. I’m a bag of hormones that is only allowed to serve men as a never ending fun fair, and shall my mood enter a stage whereby I, god forbid, turn critical of men’s behaviour, or, oh my god, argue with a man and dare to express my opinion, my hormones immediately feel the heat of the spotlights of blame and make me doubt myself. Hear me out: women can’t think straight. Their emotions are guided by hormones, especially if they’ve been on contraceptive pills for long enough. But goddamn it we have moments of clarity! Moments when we realise that women are more than what meets the eye; that logic is not at all alien to us; that we too crave for an interesting life, aside from shoes and purses, we crave for beautiful minds! When the dishes are piling up in the sink the image of a woman in an apron inevitably floats to the surface of the mind and it’s a slippery slope from there. All the dust and mess, all the dirt and clogs – where are the women to clean it up? What if the women stopped caring one day? Would men pick up the sponges, get on their knees and start polishing the wooden floors? Would they lick clean all the splinters and crack so that the women can carelessly walk all over them in muddy high heels as their ultimate revenge? Would they embrace the windows and rub them clean until the glass shines like diamond, so that we can see our gorgeous reflections in the windows? Would they sit down with a fancy calculator to meticulously plan a budget that we can later recklessly annihilate to satisfy a single quirky yearning? Oh no, god no! That would be too sweet a revenge that would make women fat and thus undesirable; and since the women’s only purpose in life is to serve men, turning into a fatter bag of hormones is not an option!

But when is this life gonna end? When are men going to stop being selfish twats with no interest other than spreading their seed and playing computer games where they pretend to be significant war heroes with an impact in the lives of others? How did these creatures even come to dominate the arena of world politics, business and academia? Oh wait, I know how: by exploiting women! Maybe in the next life I could be god. I’d be a much better god, I’m sure. I’m a woman, I’m much more considerate, better at multitasking, much better at organising things, setting priorities, planning ahead, much more articulate about my moral standards, less evil, less cruel and much more gorgeous, so that when I do create human beings by my own image they’d all be pretty and fit.


- 28 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

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  1. You may have a point, but just imagine how horrible it is actually being a man.

    10 Jun 2007, 17:01

  2. Being a man is about being a person, a responsible member of the civilised society, much like being a woman is. No one said you have to be a lazy, messy, irresponsible, slutty and juvenile twat to classify as a man. Please, do point out where the hardship lies!

    10 Jun 2007, 17:45

  3. Well for a start we’re missing part of a chromosome, and that causes a lot of problems besides colour blindness! Sure, you don’t have to be all those things to qualify as a man, but we do seem kind of predisposed towards most of those problems so maybe its built in.

    10 Jun 2007, 20:56

  4. I’d say the main hardship right now is being the subject of this post :)

    Seriously, though, (in the west at least) the legal and many of the cultural barriers to equality between men and women have already been torn down. As to things like under-representation of women in big businesses’ senior management and in government, I think getting more qualified women to apply for these jobs would be the best step forward available; if those jobs are anything like engineering, it is not so much discrimination as lack of female applicants that make the field male-dominated.

    Just my $0.02

    10 Jun 2007, 21:30

  5. Simon, humans consider themselves superior to animals precisely because they possess logic and rational thinking and are capable of overcoming the ‘built in’ natural instincts. We’ve learnt to hold our pee until we can find a toilet, why can’t we (men) learn to overcome the laziness and become more responsible?

    Michael, not intending to imply that everything should be blamed on the men in the world, but quite possibly the very reason there aren’t that many female applicants is because they’ve been housebound by men to do the house chores for the men while the latter go out there and apply for the jobs! So the largest obstacle in capable females gaining greater social status and acknowledgement is… men :D

    11 Jun 2007, 13:08

  6. Eh, I don’t know any women who are housebound by chores – all my friends from school and university, and all my female relatives, are employed (or retired).

    Anyway, how much time can one really spend doing chores? I do my own shopping, cooking, vacuuming, washing, etc; and at the same time maintain a busy study schedule; and find time to do sport and socialise with my friends. I honestly don’t know where you could come up with enough chores to keep someone busy full time; doing chores takes me a handful of hours a week at best.

    Eh, but I suppose it could be argued that there are housebound women and I have never met any precisely because they are housebound. But still I can’t believe this is common, except for families with young children.

    Anyway, if you know any women who want a house-husband to do chores while they do a highly paid job, put them in touch with me; that sort of life sounds pretty good to me.

    11 Jun 2007, 19:08

  7. The final paragraph alone is bursting with enough invalid stereotypes to discredit anything else that is said in this post.

    12 Jun 2007, 01:53

  8. If you are always looking out for other people to disappoint you, you will never be disappointed. If you are always looking out for other people to delight you, you will always be delighted.

    12 Jun 2007, 11:08

  9. Lynda

    You’re so right Richard.

    12 Jun 2007, 12:48

  10. “When are men going to stop being selfish twats with no interest other than spreading their seed and playing computer games where they pretend to be significant war heroes with an impact in the lives of others?”

    When women expect it of them. If it is any consolation men do improve with age as women wise-up and become better at setting boundaries.

    “humans consider themselves superior to animals precisely because they possess logic and rational thinking and are capable of overcoming the ‘built in’ natural instincts”

    ‘logic and rational thinking’ is, in my experience, not something I would associate with a woman I am in a relationship with. Indeed the only time a woman seems to demonstrate these qualities in a relationship is when she is being devious.

    12 Jun 2007, 16:42

  11. Hahahahahahahahahahaha! I remember you from last time you ballsed-up a feminist rant. This one is less funny than the previous one, but I still stand by my remark that you would make a world-class inadvertent-satirist.

    12 Jun 2007, 17:10

  12. Amanda

    Jesus, what a rant… female emancipation is dead end enterprise. Gotta deal with it.

    14 Jun 2007, 18:24

  13. Amanda, darling, please enlighten me on how you are dealing with it personally. The world is crying for a knowing answer.

    15 Jun 2007, 12:24

  14. Oh, and James, where, at any point in this post, did I mention freaking feminism?! Get off your assumptions already that every woman speaking of the unfairness of arrangements within a heterosexual relationship is necessarily a feminist.

    15 Jun 2007, 12:28

  15. I agree, you are right to point out that my calling you a feminist was actually extremely derogatory to the cause of feminism.

    15 Jun 2007, 18:06

  16. This is a very clearly thought out and insightful blog.

    That is, if your intention was to make women look stupid and rubbish.

    18 Jun 2007, 16:52

  17. anon

    anyone who has sex is retarded

    21 Jun 2007, 02:31

  18. Hero

    Look. women aren;’t better – they are allowed to be better than they were only because men have created a stable enought society that this can happen.

    There is a latent idea that women are clever, sassy multitaskers and men are lazy unclean slobs – this is weak and unintelligent sexism and exposes women as moral whores – willing to move their moral positions on equality and fairness around to suit narrow-minded goals.

    22 Jun 2007, 23:06

  19. Moral whores, you say? You know what’s a latent idea? The idea that men created a stable society. Perhaps it’s women who’ve actually kept it stable? And perhaps if women were given equal opportunity, we’d not be bystanders of human development but join in and give our contribution to the society? Ever thought that if women are capable of things it’s best to utilise their talents than to repress it under coined stereotypes such as ‘moral whores’, ‘hormonal’ and ‘unstable’? And what exactly is this narrow-minded goal you are speaking of?

    23 Jun 2007, 02:31

  20. Hero

    Do I really have to argue-by-numbers? Women will move their moral postion on equity and fairness in order to persue selfish pro-women and pro-themselves goals, whilst simultaneously trying to stake a claim to being the more nurturing sex. Funny how ‘nurturing’ is confused with ‘helping girls only’.

    We need to put this into perspective. I went to a school where boys and girls did the same subjects and the same exams for those subjects. Never once did I hear a teacher explaining any concept with the phrase ‘this is an x type of task which explains why boys are often better at it’ Times I have heard the phrase ‘this is a planning task and women are better at planning’ in the last week – 1, times I have heard the phrase ‘girls tend to find this easier because’ this week – 1, times I have heard the phrase ‘women are better’ this week in addition to this, by tutors – 2.

    Women are adamant that dicrimination is wrong, yet give those same women some authority and they will discriminate over and over with no thought for the consequences.

    24 Jun 2007, 22:22

  21. Hero

    Sorry, I forgot to address your point that women keep society stable. I’m not sure where you gt this view from, except from being sure that you are expousing it purely becuase you think that by default women ‘must’ be stabilisers because men do all this nasty stuff like war.

    Well I’m sorry to have to remind you, but the fight for resources is what we are talking about. the negotiation for resurces, control over those resources and the manipulation of resources has always been a male initiative. Women have been watching and have learnt. but they have learnt from men.

    Stability includes building roads, legislation, political systems, economies, philosophies of emotion and philosophies of interaction. Women have always taken a back seat and allowed the work to be done for them. Only recently have women been unable to automatically have resources given to them by men (they were quite content when they were) and since the given of resources from men to women has been under threat, women have sought to try to gain control over resources independently – but this has always been in the context of a stable world. IN countries where economic and political stablitity doesn’t exist women are weak and powerless. In countries where many men have died in the pursuit of stability, women are powerful and respected.

    24 Jun 2007, 22:33

  22. Um guys… think for a second. A woman. Writing. Angrily. About men.

    Do we know what makes women write angrily about men?

    It’s not feminism. It’s not humanism. It’s all about auntie flo visiting. Probably.

    Think about that for a moment.

    24 Jun 2007, 23:14

  23. Perhaps you are hanging out with the wrong men Lu, i dont care about what bits you’ve got, i care about how you act, what you can offer as a person. Men and women arent identical, but i think everyone on this blog has the divide wrong. Stop ranting about men and women and start talking about lazy people and people who DO things. Some women are moody and only interested in shoes. Some, such as yourself, are interested in real things. The same applies to men, some are just Geeky sexist computer gamers, but i dont want to be classified as such (although this may just be because my computer has a processor that needs a cup of coffee just to wake up). Angela Merkel’s hosting of the G8 showed just how remarkable a woman can be if she overcomes sexism (she used to be called ‘the girl’ of German politics) and really give a bunch of incompetent men a run for their money. Also i dont think you should get defensive about feminism, less interested women have made it a dirty word, but it is as valid a concept as any other.

    02 Jul 2007, 21:49

  24. Mr. (or Mrs) Anonymous, I would just like to thank you for contributing such a thought through complex and valid point to an otherwise mindless discussion.

    Why? Why bother writing something that is, as well as completely childish and blatantly untrue (consider if everyone who isn’t a retard didn’t have sex and ponder how long the human race would survive), but just gets in the way of what is actually a very valid discussion of the roles of the different genders in the modern society.

    I bet you’d never put your name on such a comment as that. Please prove me wrong and do so next time, so that I can avoid you in the future.

    06 Jul 2007, 13:41

  25. Sue

    James Hall, one of the most annoying things ever is when people say “I would like to thank you” for something when it is quite clear that they don’t have any desire to thank anyone at all. I find these words completely detract from any point someone may be trying to make and they always annoy me almost beyond words. In terms of annoyance I would put it up with people on check-out counters in supermarkets licking their fingers to separate carrier bags. Just ask yourself, do you want other peoples spittle on your food?

    08 Jul 2007, 00:01

  26. Alfie, you are quite right in saying that it is more of a divide between the lazy ones and the more responsible ones. It’s just so happens that most of the guys I know are less responsible than girls. And possibly that’s the way things were supposed to be in order for the humanity to survive its infancy when it knew little about the world and only relied on things like brute force. However, it’s about time we get rid of all of this ‘roles of genders’ thing. Yes, men can’t give birth and women can’t pee standing up, but other than that we aren’t all that different. So why not start treating women with more respect? Feminism is the foundation for all of this ‘sexual revolution’, but it too needs updating. I don’t mean to slate it, but I do think it’s a thing of the past.

    Right… James. Did you have a point anywhere in your comment at all? It reeks of bitter sarcasm and yet not a single constructive thought. Who would have thought! Please, if you have it all figured out, do share your wisdom. Oh, and I’m not anonymous, it’s a technical fault. But I guess you didn’t know that either.

    08 Jul 2007, 22:03

  27. Hero

    Yes, that’s right, in the past when men had ‘more power’ it was all ‘brute force’ wasn’t it? When are you thinking of?

    Society has been built up almost exclusively by men, in terms of political economic, social, systems, infrastructure etc, and now when cociety’s biggest advancements are coming about because of computers – a very male preserve what are women doing but riduculing the geeky men that are giveing them all the opportunities!

    10 Jul 2007, 20:15

  28. Lu – “anon
    anyone who has sex is retarded”

    Is what James Hall was on about. You silly silly girl. You are quite the reactionary, aren’t you? That I happen to agree with the anonymous commenter doesn’t make his/her comment any more useful in this debate. In fact, my support is generally seen as a glaring beacon to avoid whatever it is that I am supporting.

    19 Jul 2007, 09:47


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