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December 20, 2004

Things we managed to convince Jenny of

Thought this was worth a mention- although it can not be fully accredited to myself of course! There were a number of beneficiaries that aided the cause. These people, who for the sake of their very safety shall remain unnamed, helped to forge a human-sized pill of golden hogwash that was rammed down the throat of enduring gullibility with the accuracy and explosiveness of a well-placed bread-loaf bomb. And that bread-loaf bomb exploded with tremendously pleasing results- in the name of freedom! Freedom of speech that is…

Anyways, here's the list.

  • My pumpkin was carved using a crafty combination of acid and lasers- provided by my sources in engineering.

  • When the pieces of a jack-o-lantern are separated, the culprit will endure a 30-day curse during which it is advisable to avoid all contact with creatures having four or more legs.

  • The muppets are not only real, but Ms. Piggy is the highest paid actress in the United States. (ok, she didn't really believe that one. I think she's on to us…)

  • The great wall of China was in fact originally supposed to be a square, but was only 25% completed due to lack of enthusiastic workers, rocks, and money.

There are more I'm sure of it- I just can't seem to recall them right now. I hereby pledge to update this post when I remember…

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