at this moment i feel like to express my feeling and thoughts..
effort or fate… which one is more important and useful to possess?
especially in life and the relationships kind of thing..
there is a famous chinese proverb, sound like the following..
"should you fated to possess it.. you will definitely get it finally..
but should you fated not to have it, then you should not force to get it."
so should we put effort and intitiave into a relationship or any of our hopes?
hmm.. all this while i believed that should we put in enough effort.. it will eventually change the fate.. but i started to change in my perception recently..
there was one morning when i got out from my car i noticed there was a very big catterpillar underneath my car near the front tyre..
the catterpillar was overturned and struggling itself to turn back so that it could crawl again..
i felt very pity to the catterpillar.. so i decided to take a straw from my car to help to turn it.. i managed to turn it and saw it start crawling again.. i thought it will crawl far away..
few hours later.. upon reversing my car i saw the catterpillar lying motionless on the floor of my parking bay.. apparently the catterpillar was still crawling underneath my car.. and when my tyre started to move, she seemed to be trapped..
the rationale that i got was that although i have tried to save the catterpillar and i managed.. but after a few hours, it was still crawling around my tyre.. so this somehow showed that no matter how i help the catterpillar to stay alive and fly away.. but the catterpillar was fated to die..
i felt very upset that day cos i hate to kill, even it was accidentally and it was just a catterpillar. Most dissapointed was that i have had helped her to stay alive and why it was me that accidentally kill the catterpillar..
i 'm contemplating to give up my hopes.. cos i couldn't even help to save a small creature from dying.. what to say to help myself to change the fate..
i hope i can be more optimistic in myself..