All entries for Friday 31 March 2006

Because I got High

This is for my IB217 project. I will be a hypothetical class C drug dealer on, for some hypothetical reason, the brink of bankruptcy. To dignify myself as a 21st century homo sapien, I will open a cigar bar on Broad Street and intoxicate every undignified person who walks in with my pure evil airborne toxins. Eventually, I will be able to maintain a consistent air quality of 95% tobacco smoke, 4% anonymous gases including oxygen and 1% fart (to serve as a diversion when authorities conduct searches). My primary business shall be in Cuban cigars, but I will also operate a bar, hang banners for Jayday March and Festival 2006 and will bring in a jukebox that features bands with one or more members who have died from smoking weed. Taking into account a personal oxygen gas mask, rent, cigar imports, alcohol purchases, various licences, labour costs, general maintenance, bills, fines and/or bail, I hope to avoid economic failure and have as much fun as possible before smoking gets banned in all enclosed public spaces across England from the summer of 2007. Got a light mate?

: 31 Mar 2006 16:30 |  Comments (2) |  Close comments |  Report a problem