February 10, 2015

Coaching– receiving it

This is the time to explore my boundaries and exercise my potential.

yes being a good leader, friend or colleague comes not only with being patient for mistakes and shortcomings but also with caring enough for someone to help them grow. I guess there are ways to do this that may have better outcomes for the individual than others.

You've gotta ask yourself if you are saying this with genuine support and belief in your friends future and socioemotional well being, or if your just trying to prove that you can critically analyse their behaviour with some sense of superiority.

where the above is leading to is pretty obvious. But what may be interesting to think about is how we ourselves perceive negative comments, whether it be from friends, our boss our, our partner, our parents or our teachers.

yes you may have pissed someone off with your behaviour and their a little mad when theyre giving you this feedback, however there is some underlying factor, maybe a mistake or maybe its actually something you never realised you did. nevertheless this is feedback and honestly if we knew how valuable the angry words coming out of a persons mouth sometimes can be we would avoid alot of mistakes.

ok so I am thinking, next time im in a group and someone is giving me negative feedback- what if I actively make the choice to let negative emotions go and to get that underlying wisdom or piece of advice out of this person. Yes maybe you think reacting negatively would give you satisfaction, it wont help anyone certainly not you in the future.

If we can overcome this short term negativity maybe we can really take on these fee therapeutic sessions and try and see what we are doing to make someone feel that way and to see if yes there really is a very important underlying factor here that i need to change about myself.

how many bad choices would i avoid in the future this way. maybe by fixing a shortcoming in my team working style now i can earn a promotion for my level headed approach to so and so in the future! you never know what you may sow from just keeping your cap on now! not to mention the respect you would gain form your colleague for being so proactive about what they have said.

- 2 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

  1. I love your thought about asking ourselves if we truly believe in supporting our friends well being or if we just trying to prove that we critically analyse them with some sense of superiority. Made me think of the past when I found myself in the latter one a couple of times. I met different people in the past but it is here at Warwick that I finally learned to accept everyone the way they are without looking down on them. I guess this is what I needed to learn and where I had to change and where I still have room for improvement^^ Sorry for becoming a bit emotional, but your blog made me realise this and I am not afraid to share my thoughts anymore ;-)

    15 Feb 2015, 21:04

  2. Hey Carina i love that thought! have also learnt something very similar to that with being here! its such a powerful thing to learn and we are so lucky to see it at this stage of our lives because it equips us for the very best experiences in the future. If we can learn to utilize these types of perceptions on as many levels as we can then we surely will take certain journeys so much better than say someone with negative perceptions will.

    And always feel free to share such amazing pearls of wisdom hun, its the only way we can enrich our own perceptions.

    22 Feb 2015, 14:54

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