All entries for Wednesday 12 January 2005
January 12, 2005
Today's 3 hour outing in central Coventry has brought on a number of realisations.
- Coventry is populated almost entirely by chavs and old ladies, and both of these groups hate bus drivers. Not that bus driver hating is something exclusive to these types of people, but what the hell…
- Tie Rack is incorrectly named. It should actually be Multicoloured Headscarf Rack. Admittedly it's not as catchy, but certainly more accurate.
- There is still no where in England where I can buy trousers that fit. According to the clothing industry, men with 30 inch waste and 33 inch legs do not exist. As I am not a fan of belts or wearing chavvy tracksuit bottoms, as well as being incredibly fussy about, well, everything, this poses me a rather large problem.
- Pritt-stick has undergone personification, and now refers to itself in the first person. This is terrifying.
- It is impossible to get more than half the items you want on any single shopping trip.
And finally something (possibly) more interesting. The music that is played in many clothing shops seems in some way to match the clientele of the shop. For example, a shop playing loud hip-hop is much more likely to be visited by chavs than one playing indie, even though the ranges of clothing available in both shops are almost identical. It made me wonder which came first, the customers or the music. Did some clever store manager realise one day that his shop was populated with Kappa-trouser-wearing townies with menacing frowns, and put on some bad music to make it less likely that they would knife him, or did said townies just get drawn to the shop because of the music, like particularly brain-dead moths to a light-bulb. Hmm. I canít quite decide if that sentence requires a question mark or not, so Iíll put one here just to be on the safe side?
Iím not entirely sure of the clarity with which I have transmitted that thought, but, as was hinted at above, I have just spent 3 hours being totally unable to accomplish the simple task of buying some trousers. Hopefully a trip to Leamington (in the distant future, once I have recovered from todayís expedition) will prove more fruitful, but Iím not willing to bet on it.