February 23, 2005

#1– greek gods

as a self-confessed fan of all things ancient (by that i mean civilization wise, not old leery men), i’m going to rate the ancient gods on their respective awesomeness to see which was really the greatest ancient civilization…

first, the greek gods: (i think i’ve covered most of the major gods here..)
Cronos- father of all gods, god of the sky, ruler of the titans
Rhea- wife of cronos, mother of all gods
Uranus- god of the sky

Zeus- the one, the only ruler of the gods (except Jove, Thor et al.). bit of a ladies’ man by all accounts; his record of infidelity is quite impressive.. oftentimes to be found wielding a thunder bolt or arguing with his lovely wife, zeus is quite cool, being the big cheese of olympus and all, but perhaps sadly lacking in his ability to resist the feminine wiles of the women in his life. did kill his dad to imprison the titans and become ruler of the gods, though, which makes him averagely powerful…

awesome rating: 8/10

Hera- long- suffering wife and sister of Zeus, queen of the gods, goddess of marriage and childbirth, protector of married women. not quite as cute and cuddly as in her picture, Hera is too vindictive for chips, particularly where Zeus’ illegitimate offspring/partners are concerned…but who can really blame her?? a promiscuous husband like Zeus would be enough to make any laydee a little cross..

awesome rating: 7/10

Poseidon- brother of Zeus, god of the sea and erathquakes. definite anger issues regarding Zeus’ position as king of the gods.. usually a reasonable kinda god except when mortals injure his earthly offspring (promiscuity runs in the family..)

awesome rating: 7/10

Hades- also brother of Zeus, god of the underworld and lord of the dead. irrefutable sibling rivalry here.. bit of a villain, stealing demeter’s daughter persephone like that, but at least he seems to know what he wants and how to get it.. can’t say fairer than that?

awesome rating: 8/10

Apollo- brother of artemis, god of prophecy, medicine, and archery, also god of the sun. a lot of potential, this one. sadly, never seems to be realised as he supports the wrong side (e.g. the trojans in the trojan war)..

awesome raitng: 6/10

Hermes- messenger of the gods, protector of travellers, thieves, and merchants. truly a funky god, what with his winged sandals.. known for mischief alongside the every-day deliverance of godly messages..

awesome rating: 7/10
revised awesome rating: 8/10 (for cuteness)

Aphrodite- goddess of beauty and sexual desire. able to manipulate almost every other god and mortal through controlling their sexual passions.. particularly powerful on olympus given the disposition of many of the more powerful gods Zeus towards casual liasons.. doesn’t mean i like her though, it’s a bit cheating if you ask me…

awesome rating: 5/10

Hephaestus- god of fire and blacksmith of the gods. husband of aphrodite, not often the guy to be found in her bed however (ahem, ares).. unfortunately disfigured, but nontheless very skilled maker of things, like achilles’ shield..

awesome rating: 6/10
revised awesome ratng: 7/10 (because he out-witted aphrodite)

Ares- god of war. definite anger issues here, hence the tendency to involvement in mortal wars.. not always on the winning side though..

awesome rating: 5/10

Artemis- sister of apollo, goddess of the hunt, goddess of the moon. averagely skilled in archery and hunting generally, a laydee who really knows how to kick ass..

awesome rating 6/10

Athene- goddess of wisdom, arts and crafts, and war, helper of heroes (see Iliad, Odyssey). truly an active goddess, not susceptible to the manipulation of aphrodite (she’s far too clever for that), which makes her very cool in my book. oftentimes on the winning side..

awesome rating 8/10

- 31 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

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  1. Aww, you've been a bit mean on Hermes and Hephaestus! They are both so cute!

    23 Feb 2005, 16:27

  2. this is true, but in terms of their power n stuff they don't oftentimes kick ass… although i guess hermes is quite important in the whole getting kalypso to let odysseus go.. hmm..

    23 Feb 2005, 16:39

  3. Hermes is just cute with his winged sandals! Plus, he leads dead people to the river styx which is cool cos no other olympian could go into the underworld. This must up his rating! :D

    And poor old Hephaestus is ugly and lame. :( Someone has to love him!

    23 Feb 2005, 16:58

  4. Ive just found something crazily coincidental – An Ode to Jen in a post entitled rock the casbah

    25 Feb 2005, 21:12

  5. what about Hecate?

    05 Mar 2005, 16:19

  6. and Eros? and maybe Iris?

    05 Mar 2005, 16:21

  7. ~disclaimer~ this analysis of greek gods & goddesses is by no means exhaustive- it is merely representative of my humble mortal opinion…

    06 Mar 2005, 21:24

  8. kayla

    That is a bad picture of Artemis.

    04 Sep 2005, 22:59

  9. Sophia

    quit good

    18 Apr 2006, 14:48

  10. maria

    this is so but so stupid not zeus because he is un papasito.

    05 May 2006, 20:15

  11. t-bone

    a GREAT book on gods & stuff its called

    The Lightning Thief

    25 Jul 2006, 12:12

  12. Vee

    My fifth grader need to do a report on greek gods and this was very hellpful.

    22 Sep 2006, 18:29



    20 Nov 2006, 02:29

  14. Jen Jen

    Erm, I don’t think you have done Artemis any justice. She is a fantastic goddess, she stands up for herself and other women. She even put Niobe in her place after upsetting her mum. I think thats ace!! She is by FAR the best goddess out of them all. She has the best character. In my opinion. :P but she definatly deserves a higher rating that 6.

    09 Mar 2007, 08:28

  15. Mike

    I think you did a great job. But I don’t like Artemis, Apollo, or Poseidon. And I thought Hera was Zeus’s wife, not his sister.

    16 Mar 2007, 16:50

  16. Amber

    Hera is Zeus’s sister AND wife—interesting how that stuff works, huh? :D

    24 Mar 2007, 00:25

  17. im passin re with 100

    dude this is gay u forgot the chaos the creator of uranus and gaia he was the 12st one dummy geesh but other than that very good

    28 Mar 2007, 14:39

  18. Terra

    Athene/Athena was also the goddess of warfare born from the head of zeus

    04 Apr 2007, 13:03

  19. Bana

    You forgot that the father of all gods “cronos” lives in the relm of hades after the main gods (zeus hades and poseidon) choped up their father and threw his soal there to perrish in the evil ofthe underworld.

    08 Apr 2007, 21:34

  20. beth s

    i love the greek gods

    so cool, though a little insestuas

    oh well, all fair in love, hate and running the world


    28 Apr 2007, 15:54

  21. beth s

    also, kronos is spelt with a K

    way to go bana for remembering the banishing of kronos’ soul to Tartus btw


    who can tell im obbsesd?


    28 Apr 2007, 15:57

  22. lalala

    well, you spelled lady wrong. but the picture of apollo rocks. Usually Athene’s name is also mentioned as Athena.

    29 Apr 2007, 20:01

  23. lalala

    zeus killed cronos because he was trying to save all his brothers and sisters that have been devoured by him; by giving him a potion in his drink. hera helped save zeus so he can live to do that by disguising a rock as zeus wrapped in a baby blanket. and she put zeus in a bush leaf plant.

    29 Apr 2007, 20:05

  24. Akua Mareen

    I ttthink Greek Gods Rock!!!!!!

    29 Apr 2007, 22:23

  25. Akua Mareen

    To tell you the truth, I kinda like Artemis’s picture.

    29 Apr 2007, 22:30

  26. xemzyx

    i think this sitte is very usefull because i am learning about greek gods @ school and this is perfect 4 my homwork !!!

    01 May 2007, 19:50

  27. renalds

    Well what about Dionysus he was one of the most important gods and by far he has the best story and come on the god of the vine and wine :P how can you forget him

    03 May 2007, 04:39

  28. aphrodite lover

    omg i love hurkules the show i love to watch it this site is very helpful thanx so much bye( L )

    03 May 2007, 23:02

  29. Akua Mareen

    I’m also learning about Greek Gods.I’m learning all about Greece.I have a whole Greece packet to finish by tomorrow.Bye

    22 May 2007, 00:12

  30. hihiodth

    awsome pics

    22 May 2007, 03:51

  31. summer

    who is writing this anyway???? i am doing a board game bout this stuff in skool and i thought only the pix were helpful.

    31 May 2007, 22:21

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  • who is writing this anyway???? i am doing a board game bout this stuff in skool and i thought only t… by summer on this entry
  • awsome pics by hihiodth on this entry
  • I'm also learning about Greek Gods.I'm learning all about Greece.I have a whole Greece packet to fin… by Akua Mareen on this entry
  • omg i love hurkules the show i love to watch it this site is very helpful thanx so much bye( L ) by aphrodite lover on this entry
  • Well what about Dionysus he was one of the most important gods and by far he has the best story and … by renalds on this entry

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