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August 16, 2005

Things Wot I Ave Learned In Devon

  1. Somerset is in the south-west of England not the south-east.
  2. Neither is it one of the home counties.
  3. Cheddar is in Somerset. Cheese lives here.
  4. Glastonbury is also in Somerset, not the Midlands, as one might think.
  5. Torquay is famous for Fawlty Towers. It is situated in Devon. It is not famous for its fine surf and surfers (that would be Newquay then… which is in Cornwall)
  6. Bracknell is south of Coventry, not east.
  7. My geographical knowledge is equivalent to that of a backward 3 year old child, and I should probably never have been allowed out of Yorkshire in the first place (I know Yorkshire is in the north though – 10 points to me).
  8. You can't buy wine at motorway service stations. This is terrible.
  9. It is not really the case that nature has recently become inundated by communes of lesbian ducks springing up all over the place; it is just that mallards lose their plumage (and hegemonic masculinities) out of mating season and look female.
  10. Devon is much more than a bleak depressing wind-swept expanse of moorland filled with invisible Bronze Age hut circles and bracken that needs bashing into oblivion with only a garden cane for assistance (my only previous experience of the place coming from a National Trust working holiday when I was 17).

The rest of the Devon diary (which is rather more diary-esque in character) to follow, once I have sorted out my life, general stupidity levels and masculinities chapter. I may be some time.


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