All entries for Wednesday 25 May 2005

May 25, 2005

Random night madness

Well i been trying to get to sleep for about 4–5 hours now and after watching about 2 hours of magnolia – an excellent film by the way, i tired but just cant sleep so i thought what better way than to spend my time blogging.

I guess there must be some reason why i cannot sleep so i thought i just try and get out whats buzzing around my boring and insignificant brain at 2:19 on a tuesday night. The thing that is going round my head is how little things can make you happy, maybe this is too soppy or what have you but it is true a number of small things can make u extremely happy. Today i went on a lovely walk as per usual with a couple of friends, i like my walks round gibbit hill woods and it is something that i look forward to everyday ahead of anything else. Today was an unusual walk as i was with 2 of my friends not the usual 1 who i walk with, and it was on this walk of 2hrs 30 mins that i did something that i havent done since i was a child. The game where u spin looking at the sky till u are dizzy and then try and remain standing. Much to my dissapointment i managed to finish second, but quite funnily i ended up throwing myself, obviously i was out of control as anyone would know playing this game, into some stinging nettles.

Now i know this may not seem like a happy thing and the subject title maybe confusing but there is something about it that made it the most enjoyable thing i have done for ages, maybe it the unplanned randomness of it i dunno it was a particular highlight of my day, heck probably week or 2. A number of cool and wonderous things happen on these magical walks and it is something that is most important to me. Amazing as i am probably the laziest person in the world but i guess people change maybe i will turn into an oldie who likes strolls in the parks and is looking for love, i hope so as it seems far more romantic than meeting my girlfriend drunk in top b. Oh how life seems so complex all the time, but then i guess it would be boring if not. Wow i feel so alive at the moment so full of ideas about life and thoughts and so many things when usually i am just living to breathe, it is pretty amazing. I guess it is amazing how people can change your life and just how much people can actually mean to you. How can evolution occur so productively when peoples feelings rage out maybe evolution is a part of those feelings who knows, but wow to feel love kindness and friendship is to be alive, i just wonder if animals can feel the same it would be terribly sad for them if they could not, no matter how painful things may get to love someone once even for a split second is the most important thing. The thing i think that scares me the most and maybe it just a guy thing but how do u know that love will last and how do u know that by changing the situation that things will go worse not better as too loose someone completely is a big price to pay but then again it probably is worth it. Wow i am rambling not that anyone reads this shit or could understand lol i wish i had the ability to write or to express myself then everyone could know my true feelings oh well hopefully some late night rubbish brings u closer to me or maybe it just makes me more of a mystery.

Hope you have a good day whenever and however u r reading it

May 2005

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