All 4 entries tagged Trotts Campaign For Political Correctness

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April 19, 2008

TROTT's Campaign for Political Correctness 4

Follow-up to TROTT's Campaign for Political Correctness 3 from The randomness of tomorrow, today!

The long-awaited, much-anticipated sequel to TROTT's Campaign for Political Correctness 3: TROTT's Campaign for Political Correctness 4!

Please Note: this instalment is a slightly different format: three alternatives are presented, and you may choose the third one... I mean, "whichever you prefer".

Vista/XP* Sucks

Vista/XP* doesn't suck, OS X is just better.

OS X Sucks

OS X doesn't suck, Vista/XP* is just better.

Vista/XP* and OS X Both Suck

Vista/XP* and OS X don't both suck, Linux just wipes the floor with them.

Stay tuned for Part 5... at some point in the future... maybe.

---

* Delete as appropriate.


December 15, 2006

TROTT's Campaign for Political Correctness 3

Follow-up to TROTT's Campaign for Political Correctness 2 from The randomness of tomorrow, today!

The third installment of Politically Correct terms:

Christmas

It’s not “Merry Christmas” anymore, it’s Merry Capitalist Winter Festival Promoting Gift Receiving, Goodwill to All, and Annoying the Neighbours by Singing at Them.

Smoker

Someone isn’t a “smoker”, they’re a damned fool.

Little Old Lady

Someone isn’t a “little old lady”, they’re a lady located at an altitude where the atmosphere is thicker and easier to breathe with a high level of wisdom and knowledge.

Cats are always underfoot

Cats aren’t underfoot, cats are friendly.

Until next time…


November 09, 2006

TROTT's Campaign for Political Correctness 2

Follow-up to TROTT's Campaign for Political Correctness 1 from The randomness of tomorrow, today!

Some more terms that should be brought in to practice:

Idiot

Someone isn’t “an idiot”, they just arrive at intellectual conclusions at a more leisurely pace than some other people.

Colour Blind

Someone isn’t colour blind, the rest of us just suffer from the delusion that red and green (substitute as appropriate) are not the same colour.

Racist

Someone isn’t “racist”, they just deserve to be given a clip round the ear and told to be reasonable.

Short

Someone isn’t “short”, they are located at an altitude where the atmosphere is thicker and easier to breathe.

More later…


October 28, 2006

TROTT's Campaign for Political Correctness 1

I encountered a cryptic snide comment today, that can only be interpreted as the speaker objecting to the term “disability awareness”, which to me is perfectly acceptable. This got me thinking about Politically Correct ways to cover touchy subjects…

Wheelchair

I also encountered objection to “they are in a wheelchair”, so now they are a regretful incumbent of a bespoked perambulatory replacement.

Fat

Someone isn’t “fat”, they have a mass that is unfortunately greater than what would be considered by the majority of people to be an average value.

Blackboard

Always been touchy, this one, so now it’s a board for the application of chalk having a coating that absorbs a majority of incident visible light wavelengths.

Whiteboard

And because I’m an Equal Opportunities Political Corrector, a “whiteboard” is now a board for the application of special marker pens having a coating that reflects a majority of incident visible light wavelengths.

Physically Disabled

Someone isn’t “disabled” or even “differently abled” (everyone is “differently abled”; it’s meaningless…) they are unfortunately in possession of a physical form that is regretfully incapable of performing all the tasks which many other people take for granted.

That’s all for now…


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