All entries for Monday 13 November 2006

November 13, 2006

Rules for Comedy Shows

I’ve decided to post these since so many people seem to be unaware of them. Also note that they do not apply to people who are immune to embarrassment.

Do not sit in the front row

If you sit in the front row, there it is strong possibility that you will be Talked To and may even be Made Fun Of. This is also somewhat true of the first few rows as a whole, but is especially true of the front row. If you have a choice, avoid the front row. If you desperately want the front row or cannot avoid it, a seat towards one side of the stage (i.e. not in the middle) may spare you…

Never arrive late

I cannot stress this one enough. You’ll probably be safe if you’re not in the stalls (although the front of the circle could still be risky), but if you are anywhere in the stalls other than possibly the back third then it is pretty much a certainty that you will be Complained At for being late with many Probing Questions about what you were doing that was more important. Always make sure you arrive early to a comedy gig. If you do turn up late, consider waiting until the interval before entering (well, the end of the interval really…).

Never leave before the interval

Not as bad as the previous one, but still pretty much a certainty for Being Picked On, probably with comments on Poor Bladder Control. However, it does naturally lead on to Coming Back In, which is actually a foolproof method for Being Picked On. If you need to leave, try as hard as possible to hold on until the interval, but don’t leave it so late that you need to run out; that will only serve to attract the comedian’s attention even more…

There are probably more, but these are the main ones. If you can’t follow the rules, hope you’re lucky enough to have a comedian that doesn’t pick on people; most of them do, however…

Also be aware that if you do get Picked On, you will likely be Talked To or just Referred To periodically for the remainder of the show.

You have been warned…

: 13 Nov 2006 21:04 | Tags: Comedy Randomness Rules Theatre | Comments (0) | Close comments | Report a problem