September 14, 2006

What is next?

Last night I couldn’t sleep , the TV was off and I was staring on its black display for hours , I could see what ever I was thinking about in it’s black eye. Then the story continued in bed around this question “what do I want from life?” , to answer the question I reviewed some people’s lives to find some samples ,people came into my mind in a queue , everyone with a bit of good and a bit of not my cup of tea.


I thought perhaps I am abnormal , to keep thinking about these questions , perhaps I better shut up and enjoy life as it is ,wasting days and nights as they come , sometimes taking my chances sometimes wasting them.

Then another queue came to my mind a series of interesting bits in my life , working since I was 9 starting from 2:00 am whole summer holiday , being a volunteer in war while I was only a teenager ,holding a friend’s head on my knee until he dies from bullets , getting injured from explosions , driving a motorbike since I was 11 , driving since I was 13 , selected as the best student of my school ,working as a part time taxi driver when I was only 16.being the youngest mountain cycling champion after training days and nights in those dangerous hilly roads, Studying in the top Universities , executing shows ,and teaching in the top universities in my country ,printing books , writing poems in two languages ,getting MSc in Nuclear Engineering ,establishing a college and then drowning to its debts because of lack of justice in that country. Then working and sleeping in Pizza shops in another country, doing painting, plumbing, masonry , study abroad , study MSc again , finding better jobs , getting two nationalities ,visiting many countries , finding friends from all around the world. A series of many different experiences mixed and covered with laughs, tears, loves, pains, grief and joys.


And then the question that comes after these is : so what is next , what do I want from life. I thought, I better search the internet and I found this:
http://www.healthyplace.com/Communities/Depression/related/loss_grief_4.asp

Although it talks about grief, but indirectly told me why I am thinking about what I want from life.

It seems I have some options , the first option could be – oh, just be whatever they want you to be, be around , work , watch TV (not the dark screen of course) , enjoy some holidays and then …. , you had enough, bye bye , boa noite, お休みなさい , شب بخیر , Buenas noches, لَيْلة سَعيدة, Good night ,Goeie nag, 晚安. yes , it doesnt matter what language we speak , the last word has the same meaning.

And the last option could be (I omitted the middle options ) , do something interesting before you die , like go to Africa or in any other poor country , help people in any way you can , maybe as a teacher , a consultant or whatever they need and then die in their warm priceless tears. Life is not cheap, don’t waste it.


- 5 comments by 0 or more people Not publicly viewable

  1. majid

    دوست بسيار عزيزم
    رضا جان سلام
    نمي دانم چگونه بايد بگويم ولي مي گويم اميدوارم به لطف خدا اثر گذار باشد
    ....

    وقتي به آخر متن رسيدم و دكمه Add Comment را زدم پيغام داد
    بيشتر از 4000 كاراكتر نمي توانيد ارسال كنيد و تازه فهميدم چقدر درد دل كرده ام
    بهمين خاطر با email برايت ارسال مي كنم

    به اميد ديدار
    قربانت
    مجيد

    16 Sep 2006, 07:11

  2. وحید

    سلام
    می گویند ملا انگشترش را در انبار گم کرده بود ولی در حیاط به دنبال آن می گشت از او پرسیدند چرا اینجا را می گردی گفت چون انبار تاریک است!

    17 Sep 2006, 10:40

  3. Reza

    ملا بودن هم عالمی دارد.

    17 Sep 2006, 14:11

  4. Reza

    Dear Majid,

    I have learned that
    If you have a miserable life dont think God has forgotten you and if you are in wealth dont think you have done enough to get close to Him.He is God of everyone the poor and the rich , the beleivers and the ignorants.Blessing is a rain , pouring on everyone’s garden , some people appriciate it some people not.
    in the prays when it says : God give me blessing , it doesnt mean , give me more rain , it means God teach me how to appriciate your blessing rain.

    19 Sep 2006, 11:26

  5. vahid

    سلام
    منظورم این نبود که تو ملایی!

    20 Sep 2006, 12:35


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