All entries for Thursday 22 March 2012
March 22, 2012
Are you still a firm candidate?
So, as usual this blog will open with a statement about how I haven't been blogging enough. But this time I dont think I care. It turns out the world doesn't cease to exist if you happen to forget to blog for a couple of months. Much like all of the other things that I thought were essential to my PGCE year and have turned out to be hoop jumping, box ticking, monkey dancing exercises. A bit harsh, maybe, but I am getting to the point where I wonder if I have been using my time entirely wisely this year. I have got to thinking about the sacrifices I have made in order to spend time writing lengthy lesson plans, adding annotations to those lesson plans, putting those annotated lesson plans in plastic wallets and putting those plastic wallets in files. Paper work isn't what I'm here for. I spend more time with my files than with my pupils.
Since I last blogged I have met new pupils, taught some lessons, had some success, had a car crash and attended an interview.
On Monday, I was offered a job. When they asked me 'Are you stil a firm candidate?', I couldn't physically have been any firmer. It was a glorious day that allowed me to put the PGCE into perspective. I realised that this is all just procedure. One year of madness out of what should be a very long and sucessful career. Get the qualification and get into even more debt by doing so, then finally do what you came to do in the first place - teach and earn money. This year has made me a cynic, and I had always told myself it wouldn't. As I look ahead to my employment, I am chomping at the bit to leave this all behind and just teach. On the horizon I see sustainability, autonomy and wages. No I do not want a teacher in every lesson with me watching my every move. No I do not want to fill out three forms every time I want someone to observe me just to prove that I'm as good as everyone says I am. No I do NOT want to have to tell my fiance he cant see me this weekend because I need to reference some standards and tick some more bleedin' boxes.
But seriously, I'm doing okay. PP2 is great, the kids are a joy, although the stress hurts my already tense shoulders. I still have lots to learn, but now I want to be learning and earning at the same time. In a place that isn't a two hour drive away from my family and fiance.
Oh, and these PP tasks are a waste of my time.