February 15, 2006

Post Valentine's Day Rant (not what you think)

After the “festivities” yesterday of Valentine’s Day I felt a rant coming on. So here we go.

This isn’t your standard commercialisation rant or a singleness rant but something subtly different.

I’m a Christian. A Christian with a very lovely girlfriend. As such I wanted to get her something for Valentine’s Day. Having done this, I of course, wanted a card to go with it. As my artistic skills are a little lacking, I thought I’d buy one. And here in lay my mistake

However, I hadn’t reckoned on the minds of those who come up with these cards, because, I was, quite frankly, shocked by what they showed.

Being a Christian, I’m a no sex before marriage kinda guy.

So, given that unmarried Christain men (and women) must form a significant market out there, is it so difficult to find a Valentine’s Day card that doesn’t outright talk about sex between the card giver and receiver or isn’t either dripping in sexual innuendo, or so horribly mushy that it makes you sick to read it. Why is it so damm difficult, and presumably non-financially viable, to sell a clean, simple card, with minimal messages inside for us to add our own messages. I really don’t want a card that suggests new sexual positions for us (me and my girlfriend) to try.

Come on card makers, there’s a market out there for such cards, both men and women who would like to send a clean card to which they can add their own personal messages.
Well next time I’m making my own card, no matter how rubbish it looks compared to a well drawn and printed shop one, at least I won’t be saddened by the other cards on display and put off getting any card for someone else by the rather sad and pathetic cards on sale.

At least the thought will count.

Bar-humbug


- 4 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

  1. Try Edward Monkton – although some of his have a dodgy or interesting play on words, they're not as sick and wrong the cards you're talking about seem to be! They're mainly sweet and funny. Good luck next year!

    15 Feb 2006, 17:33

  2. Ahhh thank you very much for my present and lovely card! I really appretiate the hardships that you had to go through to choose it for me and i'm sure I'll equally love anything that you make me (however artistically lacking) next year :)

    15 Feb 2006, 17:55

  3. Check out Paperchase next year – their cards are always very well designed – I picked up a very nice minimalist one this year – fancy cream card, with two little interlocking hearts on the front…

    15 Feb 2006, 20:54

  4. Brian

    I think Valentines Day is worse than just being bad.
    It’s too good AND too bad. Too wishy-washy. You
    could wish all you want, but it still ends up a wash.
    It gets built up so much that you can buy the best
    chocolate, and it still is not “her favorite”.

    I’ve been married for 14 years, since I was 18. I’m a
    pretty nice guy, not ugly, am true to my commitments,
    have a 4-year degree, and take pretty good care of
    myself. That being said, every time I hear the “do
    you know how to touch a girl” song I always think,
    “No, because I have yet to have one let me”. The
    problem besides the BUILDUP created by marketing and
    the talk like “MY husband bought ME a Beemer!” is that
    people are not generally interested in getting to know
    someone else. Any guy that shows interest to a woman
    is said to either talk too much, pry into your
    business, just act weird, or nowadays it is considered
    sexual harassment. Can’t a guy get a break? I work
    where I meet tons of people daily, and somehow I can
    connect better with a total stranger than I can people
    I have known for some time.

    My point is people, especially on Valentines Day, come
    up with all of these unfounded expectations. Example:
    why flowers? Does he owe you because he crashed your
    car a couple of months ago? Did he have an affair and
    feel guilty? Does he need to make up for all of the
    times you said you loved him and he said “I know”
    instead of alluding to the Standard Answer? Does he
    work at a flower shop? Or, does he as an individual
    really feel comfortable with you enough to know that
    he loves you, and his love is well-founded?

    Ultimately, Valentines Day is just bad because it is
    so confusing. BEING MARRIED ISN’T EVEN ENOUGH. Ok,
    I’m a different person than I was at 18 and even
    though high school was no picnic when it comes to
    love, having someone by your side does not necessitate
    a Happy Valentines Day. People do not care to get
    into the tangled web that a person’s life can look
    like from the outside enough to have a real,
    especially a loving, relationship.

    At this point I have to wonder why a normal guy cannot
    find normality around Valentine’s Day. I am beginning
    to wonder what traits or what I thought were qualities
    that I have to sacrifice just to get the opposite sex
    to give me a teddy bear and a kiss. I could allude to
    the common tricks I hear every guy who dates ends up
    pulling:
    – I could not call on purpose and yet still try to
    get every woman’s phone number.
    – I could stop passively flirting and really start
    being a dog.
    – I could pretend I’m not married and not wear my
    wedding ring to every bar I go into.
    – I could cheat.
    – I could go for the pity sex angle.
    – I could take advantage of the drunken women that I
    usually look out for.
    – and I’m could let doors slam in Women’s faces.
    Especially when they have a lot of crap in their
    hands.
    I have heard all of this works for guys who get laid,
    and women are still intruiged by this bull. Why does
    Valentines Day have to suck for me? I have to wonder
    if Valentine’s Day isn’t the day I should try and turn
    things around by trying to be a total dick for a
    change. If you do, I’m sorry already. But I’ll be
    calling you later, so I might have the chance to
    apologize.

    As a matter of fact, here is my email address. Maybe you can explain
    to me personally why it sucks.
    charlottebanker@yahoo.com

    11 Feb 2007, 18:00


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