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June 18, 2005

What defines a business or rather MY business

Today a computer geek – naming no one – said to me when I said to him this web-hosting company gives unlimited e-mail accounts

You can grow your company without limit.

I couldn’t help but laugh out loud… and respond

So my company is defined by the number of e-mail accounts not by its business!!

May 26, 2005


Follow-up to Illness from Fiona's blog

I never knew I was allegic to exams… they caused me flu and migranes and asthma!

My illness have gone far enough for me! I went to see the doctor yesterday morning before my exam to see what they could give me to make me feel better.

They gave me 6 little pills to sollow every morning for 5 days.

I felt a little better in the afternoon.

Today was feeling ok ish for the exam in the morning.

Somehow after lunch the exam…. I managed to need run out to the toliet to throw up in the middle of the exam. I returned to my seat feeling sick still and dizzy or more likely wanting to faint.

May 24, 2005


This damn thing called illness…. most occasions they come at thewrong time and place.

It is when you have too mcuh too do and you are struglling and it hits you. And handicap you. The more you try to do things the more it handicap you leaving you hopelessly in bed…

What can I do with illness+exams? what does it = to?

May 23, 2005

End the Spam Cycle

Now I am forced to sit in front of my desk all day revising and somehow couldn’t help checking my e-mail too often and blogging. Well, I genuinely want to share some funny stuff I suddenly received in an e-mail account I consider to contain only SPAM

I decided why should I be annoying and forward them to people. I have almost given everyone the URL to this blog, so if they care enough about me they could read my blog and they will find depressing stories of mine, cynical views of the world, random thoughts and pictures I have taken and most of all the things I find funny.

Ich habe always been a person who likes to share… stories, adventures, pictures, and friends. Some how I have been scaring people away or something that they don’t like me sharing. I don’t really ask for anything in return maybe just to stick around until I finish giving.

I am not really getting depressed as exams doom over my head (maybe after so many years of exams I am immune to it or them rather) just into a state of cynicality. I see everything darker, gloomier angles of things.. everything (to be continued)

Fatherly Pride

I would like to share a story that is now been the second time sent to me... a funny story that I had no one to share with the first time round I got it. Now I have the chance to share and here it is:

Four friends, who hadn't seen each other in 30 years, reunite at a party.

After several drinks, one of the men had to use the rest room. Those who remained talked about their kids.

The first guy said, "My son is my pride and joy. He started working at a successful company at the bottom of the barrel. He studied Economics and Business Administration and soon began to climb the corporate ladder and now he's the president of the company. He became so rich that he gave his best friend a top of the line Mercedes for his birthday"

The second guy said, "Damn, that's terrific! My son is also my pride and joy. He started working for a big airline, then went to flight school to become a pilot Eventually he became a partner in the company, where he owns the majority of its assets. He's so rich that he gave his best friend a brand new jet for his birthday."

The third man said: "Well, that's terrific! My son studied in the best universities and became an engineer. Then he started his own construction company and is now a multimillionaire. He also gave away something very nice and expensive to his best friend for his birthday: A 30,000 square foot mansion."

The three friends congratulated each other just as the fourth returned from the rest-room and asked: "What are all the congratulations for?"

One of the three said: "We were talking about the pride we feel for the successes of our sons. …What about your son?"

The fourth man replied: "My son is gay and makes a living dancing as a stripper at a nightclub."

The three friends said: "What a shame…what a disappointment."

The fourth man replied:

No, I'm not ashamed. He's my son and I love him. And he's lucky, too. His birthday just passed and the other day he received a beautiful 30,000 square foot mansion, a brand new jet and a top of the line Mercedes from his three boyfriends."

Is giving 100% enough?

Follow-up to The fittest survive or the most read? from Fiona's blog

I am glad that some people actually read my weblog. YEAH. Well somehow it seems these days EQ and interpersonal skills gets you further than IQ.

To avoid being sued for plagiarism I hereby give credits to whoever wrote the following clever mathematical formula.
Unfortunately I don't know who wrote this originally but I received it through my inbox from my friend William (don't know his surname either).

What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?

Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z is represented as:
1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26.


8+1+18+4+23+15+18+11 = 98%


11+14+15+23+12+5+4+7+5 = 96%


1+20+20+9+20+21+4+5 = 100%


2+21+12+12+19+8+9+20 = 103%

AND, look how far ass kissing will take you.

1+19+19+11+9+19+19+9+14+7 = 118%

So, one can conclude with mathematical certainty that while Hard work and Knowledge will get you close, and Attitude will get you there, it's the Bullshit and Ass-kissing that will put you over the top.

May 19, 2005

Idea of revision

The whole idea of revision… does it meant to put you off or encourage you? I was never sure. By glancing at my shelf the stuff I should know the number of pages of information scares me. I suppose I know most of it as I have been working throughout the year steadily but yet still I files and lectures notes intimidates me. Makes me feel like I don’t know anything.

Is there a cure for such disorder or is it common to others too?

I am looking forward to the holidays yet dreading as I have the unsettled feeling that I might need to come back for re-sits.

May 16, 2005

Places I have been

Country of the world I have been to…it seems a lot by the map but only a few in the list! Summary 26 visted countries- that's only 11% of the world!

create your own visited country map

Map of US: states I have been to. 7 states and that is a mere 13% of the whole US

create your own personalized map of the USA

Map of Europe I have been to: 14 countries and it's 27%!

create your personalized map of europe

May 15, 2005

The fittest survive or the most read?

Yet another day. Yet another year. I thought life would be interesting at University that I won’t get bored but this year have proven wrong. I blame it mostly on my injury or (I should but it as Ex-injury). I need to get out more often and regularly. I need to get more fresh air regularly. As I catch up with friends who are still on their gap year I am not sure whether I am depressed by the fact that they are out and about having no worries of exams or lucky in a sense that I still have a little concentrate let from school for me to cope with exams!

Exams exams exams… is that all academic have evolved to? I know that it is suppose to benchmark people so for employers or who ever else easier to identify the quality they need in people. Now it had become ridiculous I think. You have to take a personality test to prove that you can get a long with people so you can be hired? WHAT?! When had it meant that if you failed to answers these questions in a certain way or you so happen that you didn’t get on with the person access you that means that you are unable to work with other people? I still believe in experiences rather than text books. Not everyone can learn from text books efficiently that they would be able to apply to situations. Whereas “putting one at a deep end” makes them have to learn fast and apply what they already know. The world is all about survival the fittest not about who can read most, which is not what I believe God's design is about.

May 11, 2005

Another year rather than another day!

Yet another year has flown by. Still don’t really know what I am doing. Travelling aimlessly… well at that time there were reasons and points but now looking back at everything it seem rather pointless. I don’t know exactly why and how but I have yet entered another pessimistic spell. Maybe because of exams… an allergic reaction to exams. I don’t seem to know what my brain does to my body these days. Kind of I know it is working hard spinning hard but I seem to have last track what it is doing! What it is doing to me! I feel rather lost… so lost that somehow I think/I seem to have to found my Nemo that I still feel I am lost somewhere… I am not saying I feel like I have lost something… just lost maybe in translation as I experience a decline in my understanding in this language I am so tying in……

May 07, 2005

To Gosford….

Please LOG on to see the pics… (especially Red May).

What a week–end

A wedding to attend to and a ball in the space of 3 days! It was fabulous fun though! :>

Wedding party of a dance partner of mine from April 2004. Did a jive in a opening for a concert! It was fun and shocking to everyone elses! :> Kind of time of my life thing as I have managed to shock so many people! Espeically those who think they know me well! At his wedding I was sitting next to an old schoolmate of mine… from kindergarten!


Fun night with dancing.

Ball on Sunday night. Just like to say.. fabluous carbaret! Thanks to Espen :>

April 28, 2005

Regularity could help to improve health!

As exams are getting closer and closer I should be more concerned about them and doing something or rather a lot about them. I have started revising and all, but I still seem to lack concentration here and now. Maybe that is due to the lung infection that I have at the moment. Well I hope that won’t last long!
This term suddenly I felt like I am at a place for academics rather than for the ride. I suppose that attitude is important and should have felt like that from at least last term onwards but honestly I haven’t been.

Sometimes I really don’t know what to do with myself. For example I worked so hard over the holidays (just not academics) that when I got back to Uni and finished all due holiday work I felt relaxed and rested, and then I got ill. For me… my life is just never ending work… business, travel, business travel, academics, personal skills, interpersonal skills… Work never seems to reduce how ever hard I work… but still I am not discouraged and I am still striving through each day by doing as much as I can in the time and health given!

I never seem to manage to do all the things I want to do… but I am getting through them slowly and steadily… A few things on my list are doing the dinghy instructor course, driving licence, Yacht master, all the medals in Latin and Ballroom dancing… etc so the list goes on… I suppose one would say that since I am still young I have plenty of time to achieve these goals, but realistically thinking I don’t really, as the purpose of doing these things is to open up more opportunities to have more fun and explore more of my abilities and limits to a certain extent. You are only young once… Sometimes I wish I don’t need any sleep at all so I can do more. I suppose a way to keep myself healthy enough to do everything I do now is to sleep well regularly and eat well regularly and breath fresh air regularly!

March 22, 2005

Yet another addiction of mine–Travelling

Currently located in New York. Last Sunday we went to Stamford for Tri-State Challenge (a Latin& Ballroom dance competition). Was dancing 20 dances – well technically 4 categories doing all 5 dances in each. As I lack partner I joined Mrs Chong in dancing in Professional-Amateur category. First Open comp and I managed to get 18 firsts and 2seconds in my 20 dances!

The travelling of this Easter holiday (which I am currently on) its itinerary has changed for the 7th time already! Still enjoy travelling though wish I have no exams at the end of it! Great excuse for travelling is BUSINESS! :->

March 09, 2005

Societies’ Exec

After going to so many elections for societies’ Exec now I have a good idea of what it is all about. What you will do and how willing you want to make a difference really didn’t matter a bit. It is the ability to boast about yourself and making false promises that will earn you the position!

Well I am not in any Exec this coming year. But I am very sure that I will begin to make a difference one way or another for the love of the sport sake!

My other addiction…. theatre

I love the theatre. Whether watching a production or teching one. For those who knows little in terms of theatre please me describe. General speaking tech theatre is separated into 4 different areas: Design, Stage Management, Lighting and Sound.

It is rather obvious what Lighting and Sound does. They design it, another group of people rig what is designed (usually lack of crew means designer does the rigging too), yet another person operated the lighting board during the performances (usually not the designer but one of those who helped to rigged), and I missed out the designer programme the lighting board in terms of which cue has which light on a certain level to achieve certain effects.

Sound- well the “design” the sound in terms of speakers placed at certain place or number of speaker to achieve certain effects. Research and get sound effects.

Stage management: well, this is a very vague area. As the SM team does everything else excluding operating the LX (lighting) board or the Sound desk. This includes props making/finding/buying, helping to paint or create the set, invent new ways to solve a problem on stage instantaneously, making sure most of the cast and more importantly all the crew are happy, cueing the show and rehearsals, making sure rehearsals and performances run very smoothly, try to compromise between director and the budget! And so the list goes on…. But you should have a good idea the stuff involves.

If you are someone who learns very quickly I think tech theatre holds a lot of benefit in terms of learning people management, time management, stress management and how to react responsibly and instantly. That’s how I learnt and still am! Great fun, lots of work (mentally and physically) and lots to learn!

March 04, 2005

Maybe NOT!

Maybe I am crap at giving speech about myself. Somehow I don’t seem to have a problem with facts and opinions about things. But when I have to convince people that I am THE one I lost all effectiveness in speech. (Maybe this entry should go under PDP instead!)

Recently I have been writing a lot of “business” e-mail. After attending to Warwick skills module of “Effective Business Writing” it seems to me that most of the time I communicate with “business” related people too personally. The thing is that I DO know them personally and their business is VERY personal to them too. Couldn’t help to start wondering is too personal the way to go or is it rather a “NO-GO”.

I have never studied Business as a subject so I wouldn’t really know I suppose. So far these Economics lectures seem common sense to me rather than something I have to learn! Is me the problem here… How am I going to pass this module if most things on the syllabus seem so blatant to me!

Is my reason of being at Uni a matter of networking than career building? That’s the thing though I like to do many different things in different field/industry. So in the grade theory of the Careers Services that I am not really motivated enough in any thing I want to do. I have to disagree on that one. When I am passionate about one thing I will just go for it and work my way there meaning even if I don’t know much about it I will find out more and try it rather than making sure everything works before attempting.

One of the tips form the career service that I attended to their presentation today mention that one need to understand one’s personality to enable a career decision. Well I know my personality. I like to stretch myself in all areas. Physically in my sports, dancing and Tech theatre, psychologically challenge in my business and in Tech theatre, creativity challenge in marketing in my business and Tech theatre, challenge in terms of dealing with all sorts of problems and people in everyday live and in EVERYTHING I do.

I love challenge. I suppose I am even addicted to it too. Always finding new way to stretch myself constantly. Or is that the thrill of being adventurous.

March 03, 2005

Future Social Sec or photomaniac??

This is only my third lesson missed so far since I came to Warwick. I came along to classes every week with only 3 exceptions, even though I might not have been feeling up for dancing every week I still came along to see my friends. Friends that I have met through this club and from fencing! (There is a strange link between Fencing and Latin and Ballroom dancing.) Apologies for not being here today due to my commitment in the Tap Show and Hot Mikado. Ensuring those in the show that they will have some lights and sound to dance and sing to.

I have been to every comp this year. Support our team even though I never get any further than a maximum of 2 rounds in any of them! I still went along to every comp to support our team, to support YOU. To cheer you on and take MANY photos for you which most of them are now on my blog though due to lack of time or rather sleep I haven’t quite managed to up-load the ones from Sheffield and Nottingham fully yet. Though, I promise that they WILL be here before the end of term.

I love dancing. I am addicted to dancing. I hope that if you vote for me as a social sec so we could have more opportunities to dance outside of classes and comps (not to say that dancing in classes and comps are not fun!). Just more chances to dance in a relax atmosphere with music and a dance floor. To show off what we have learnt!

I will end with a wish of mine: I wish that there are less carpeted floors around so we could dance in more placed and more often!

February 11, 2005

The ridicule of dancing

Just to show my dedication or rather addiction to dancing that I have been get up at 8:30 or 9:30am for more that 5 morning in a row to go dancing! Sam worked out that we danced for 12 hours last week! It was fun… sometimes tiring…. Getting up so early and yet still dancing till late at night. I suppose it is the addiction of it that keeps you going! Plus having a bunch of friends mad enough to get up so early with you to dance! It is a good for me that I actually get up in the morning looking forward to something I enjoy before having a few hours that I usually spend sleeping to work (or to write a blog entry!)

Dancing is addictive. Once you know you can dance you just want to DANCE. I am not saying it is easy. Latin and Ballroom is very technical and it is that you spent so long learning and now you can fun just dancing it! :>

Well I have to get up for 8:10 am to meet up and go to Sheffield for a competition! And guess what the competition is Latin and Ballroom dancing!

February 09, 2005

Day dreaming

The days go by and I am still day dreaming through the hours. I couldn’t exactly say that the days repeat itself again and again as they don’t. But somehow all my feelings turned numb making everyday no different from the others. When there are people around who don’t want to associate with you but when they have no one to turn to you are their last resort. It never really bothered me but suddenly it kind of HIT me. I know I am very much my own person but am I so much my OWN that seem unapproachable by others? Or am I just too approachable that they feel like they need a challenge?

Now I am in my second term at Uni but somewhat there are parts in me that I feel I am in my second year in England (being in Year 10) again. The shaved head and the sleeping pills. This combination which I thought I left it all behind when I left prep school. Unfortunately, it hadn’t. I am living life to the full (so-to-speak) but at times I just feel like everything is ON TOP OF ME literally. It is exhausting. My life seems to be an uphill of ecstasy and then a downhill of depressions. Even through years of training from depression I still don’t seem to be able to cope it well. I suppose that is depression for you isn’t it?! Other wise it would be call depression? I fought for weeks/ months to try not to get into it but it’s too late now. It had taken over me! It is like loosing control on a car when the electronics failed to work when the vehicle is at its highest speed. It is not a matter of not knowing what to do. I think out of everyone else I know best what to do. It is more of a matter of WHY. After all I am a scientist. I love asking why. Why should I bother? Why does it matter? The damage is done.

Not being able to do what I love doesn’t not help me. I am surprise that it took quite this length of time before the evil of depression begun to slam at my face! Surgery was at the end of last July. Nine months to heal completely. Nine months of no sailing and practical tech theatre. Loosing the ability of being able to go out there and sail and not have no worry about anything on shore! If I sail now I know that I will do more damage which could mean that I would not be able to sail again EVER. I cannot not begin to imagine that. Meanwhile, I will sit still and strap myself to the seat and let the depression ride by then hours of ecstasy will come….