February 26, 2005

Tardan Stallions Match 10: Stats and Facts

Tardan Stallions vs Mad Tramp
Played 10am Saturday 26th of February 2005
Venue: Westwood Astro Pitch 2

So it turns out Nayfe is a lazy tusk. He can't be arsed to write a match report – FACT! So what happened I hear you cry? Well we lost. Always the same. In this case it was 17–6 but it could have been worse, or better.

Being lazy also I can't really be bothered with writing a full report and my memory of the match is a little hazy. They scored the first, and to be fair it was a good finish leaving Baker on his return to goal no chance. A few moments later a long range bullet from Hadris went in off the post and it was 1–1. Even in the early stages the game was stretched but sadly the opposition's finishing was excellent while with Pond and Bellamy missing a couple of chances a piece. At half time it looked all over (and it was) at 8–1.

The Stallions came out with renewed vigor and in their traditional style took kick off and conceded a goal within about 30 seconds. The second half though had several positives as listed here:

  • Another Bellamy hat trick (the man is on fire… not literally)
  • A first ever Dave Pickles goal
  • An AMAZING 5 minute spell in goal from Stez (see my comment – no I'm not ashamed of the self-promotion)
  • No new injury worries.

A final note upon a certain special someone's request ;-) listed here are the negatives of the match:

  • We lost
  • Nayfe (as he was shit)
  • Naif (as he was crap)
  • Nathaniel Christopher (as he was a pile of turd)
  • NC Stallions super defender wasn't so super but in fact was SHIT

Starting Line Up:
Daniel Baker [GK]
Mark Hadris [c]
David Pickles
Owen Bellamy
Stephen Pond

Nathaniel Christopher

Goal Scorers:
Mark Hadris (2)
Owen Bellamy (3)
David Pickles (1)

Man of the Match:
Debbie Simcock (in goal for the warm up and though this at first appears to not be much of a contribution it was far better than anyone elses aka we were shit!)

Anti-Man of the Match:
Daniel Baker (he volenteered himself though I think this is just so he can take the "1st ever Anti-man of the match" award at the end of season awards evening – he is crafty is that Dan)

Attendance 3:
Gabrielle Frith
Kimberley Goddard
Debbie Simcock

February 21, 2005

Team News

We've have been challenged by Mad Tramp to a match at 10am Saturday 26th of February 2005
Venue: Westwood Old Astro 2

The Stallions are currently sitting 11th in the table, with the challengers in 14th.

Team News as follows:

Missing through apathy:
Daryl Jackson
Daniel O'Flynn

Starting Line up from:
Daniel Baker
Owen Bellamy
Nathaniel Christopher
Mark Hadris
David Pickles
Stephen Pond

February 18, 2005

Reaction to match 9:

"Owen got a hat-trick? How cute!" – Debbie Simcock, on hearing about Owen's final goal, which she'd missed.
"That's ours!" – Anon, whenever the ball went out of play.
"The opposition were much like an elephant, in that they had a pair of tusks." – Nathaniel Christopher, on the 2 opposition players who didn't endear themselves to us.
"I have a lot of respect for him. He supports a team who think Graham "I'm a fucking piece" Taylor is a legend, yet has managed to stay sane. Fair play to the lad." – Manager Daniel Baker, making a comment on the oppositions' best player.

Tardan Stallions Match 9: Stats and Facts

Tardan Stallions vs JM Crusaders
Played 2pm Friday 18th of February 2005
Venue: Westwood Astro Pitch 1

With the rain coming down, the Stallions took to the pitch in their 9th match this season. After an initial bright start, sloppy defending by Christopher led to a goal. Christopher then came off, mumbling something, to be replaced by Baker. This left the Stallions a little short at the back*. A well taken kick in left Hadris in space, and he converted, leveling the score. However, as the attention turned to attack, the defending was not the best, and the opponents scored several soft goals. Pond came off for O'Flynn, who cut himself out a good opportunity, but failed to run on to the final ball. When the call came for half time, it was 5–1 to the home side.
The second half heralded the long awaited return of Baker in goal. Christopher came back on, and atoned for his earlier shabbiness by turning in a good performance. The combination of Hadris, Bellamy and Pond provided the crowd with some very entertaining football, and their persistance was rewarded with an excellent goal from Bellamy, with Pond unselfishly passing rather than going for glory, and Hadris providing the silky link-up play. Pickles came on for Hadris, and also played well up the flank, with a great opportunity coming to him, when the Stallions were 3 on 1. He took a dig from a tight angle, but it sadly went over. Another Bellamy goal, and a couple conceded, and the game was rounded off by Bellamy sealing his hat-trick.
Final Score 8–4

Starting Line Up:
David Pickles [GK]
Nathaniel Christopher
Mark Hadris [c]
Owen Bellamy
Stephen Pond

Daniel Baker
Daniel O'Flynn

Goal Scorers:
Mark Hadris (1)
Owen Bellamy (3)

Man of the Match:
Nathaniel Christopher – For an assured performance in defence, and because he's not won it yet, and Owen's already had it twice…

Attendance 3:
Gabrielle Frith
Eloise Moir-Ford
Debbie Simcock

*NB: This is a hilareous pun. Think about it.

February 15, 2005

Tactic 5: Twat It

Punt it, run, shoot, SCORE!

Tactic 4: Corners

One player takes the corner and another stays back to cover any possible counter-attacks. This leaves two players to attack the ball at the corner. In general, the opposing team will have four players back defending: the box is likely to be congested. Therefore, the attacking players should start outside the box before making their runs. In this example the ball is drilled in low and hard, and the two attackers switch their positions: the right hand side player runs to the front, and the left hand side player runs to the back. This movement may confuse the defence, allowing the shot from the near post, or a shot or cross from the far post.

Tactic 3: Defending

The team is set up with a relatively “flat” back three, and a lone striker. Note how each defender is “goal-side” – directly between the attacking player and the goal. This principle should be applied at all defensive situations; it prevents the attacking player from a clear view of goal. The general aim of the defender should be to dispose the attacker of the ball. However, this is not always possible. If the defender cannot make a tackle, he should aim to shepherd or “jockey” the attacking player away from the goal and towards the touchline (arrowed), before making a challenge.

Tactic 2: Attacking

The defender has the ball. Note how the players are positioned in a “diamond” formation and there are two options for the defender: play to the left winger, or to the right winger. The options are at roughly 45 degrees to the defender, so the angle between them is an approximate right angle. Either of the wingers that receives the ball (black dashed line) has a multitude of options. Two examples are presented above. Example 1: the left winger gets the ball, and plays a “one-two” with the striker, overlapping the full-back and running onto the returned pass for a shot on goal. Example 2: The right winger collects the ball and plays it down the line for the striker to run onto – the striker can either take a shot, or play a cross for the other winger who makes an overlapping run into the box, as in example 1. The winger also has the option of playing a square ball to his opposite number, or a return pass to the defender.

Tactic 1: Goal Kicks

Initial positions are in a rectangle: two players on either side, one in each half, with their back to the touchline (this opens up the field of play to them, so they have options). In this example, the keeper plays the ball to the right hand side defender. The two left hand side players run towards him: this provides him with options. The right hand side attacker may also make a run around the back of the defence, into the space created by the run of the left hand side attacker; the defender with the ball can play a long pass over the top into this space for the runner.

NEWS FLASH: Bellamy Exclusive

After an entry on this very site brought such publicity to footballer/author Owen Bellamy on becoming the Amazan.co.ck number one best seller, he thought it fitting to grant the Stallions Blog an exclusive preview of his new book, titled "Soccer for Dummies".

The very first pictures from his new book are to be released shortly, with five full pages in all. Bellamy's fans wait in anticipation of the great man's tactical genius…

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