July 20, 2005

100% True Stories

These stories are completely true. I swear.

There was this six year old boy who'd been bought a chemistry set for Christmas. He'd made this potion in the evening and left it out on the kitchen table. His parents got up in the middle of the night, saw the potion, thought it was blackcurrent juice, drank it and died.

In America, there was this man and woman kissing in a field during a storm. They got struck by lightning and the woman died but the man was merely knocked unconscious. Because of the heat from the lightning they'd been fused together at their hands. A bear then came along and ate the woman's face. The guy came to, but couldn't move because they were stuck to the ground and was left to stare at the remnants of his dead girlfriend's face until he died of starvation. They were like that for a year until a group of Brownies came along on a hike and found the decomposing bodies.

A family living in Britain of Russian descent were sent a package from some relatives from the motherland. It was a jar with some powder and with it was an accompanying note written in Russian, so none of the family could read it. Figuring it to be the ashes of their Great Uncle they spread the powder somewhere appropriate, only to get a phone call a week later from the relatives asking if they'd enjoyed the gravy mix they'd sent.

- 5 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

  1. Giving a 6-year old a chemistry set that you could make something poisonous with is just not sensible.

    20 Jul 2005, 16:31

  2. hmm.. i find the second story very hard to believe:
    how did the man survive while the woman died if they were "fused" together? why did the bear only eat the dead woman and not the man?

    these are interesting read though.. imagine the kid's guilt! I wonder how he turned out.. hmmm :)

    20 Jul 2005, 16:31

  3. So what's the moral of the stories? Don't drink stuff left out on the table, snog in storms, or send foreign foodstuffs through the post? Well, that just takes all the fun out of life…

    … or I suppose you could just not give six year olds chemistry sets… because I'm sure that somehow that's responsible for all the other mishaps in some sort of cosmic gravy Chaos Theory way.

    20 Jul 2005, 21:48

  4. Sounds like something from a game of Balderdash if you ask me!

    21 Jul 2005, 00:30

  5. I think each story needs to be taken with a pinch of salt, perhaps there's a bear out there with high cholesterol.

    That's an interesting idea Elizabeth. It was the story (or a variation of the one) my mum used to get out of buying me a chemistry set for Chirstmas once.

    21 Jul 2005, 09:55

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