All 6 entries tagged Wtf
November 21, 2006
Why does Radio 1 do this to me? Some genius suggests to the DJ that they play “Gay Bar”. And they did. I was genuinely overjoyed and proceeded to “get down and boogie” as is my custom.
To my shock and horror they edited out the words.
Was it the sentence “Do you have any money? I’m going to take all your money!” that offended them? No.
So it must have been the outrageous “I’ve got something to put in you! at the gay bar!” surely?! No.
They got rid of “let’s start a nuclear war!”
Are they worried that the general public will take it too seriously? That people will start protesting “Let’s start a war! oh pretty pretty please!”. They must be really concerned that people are going to take it to heart. These five little words that come from a band that also gave us the tracks “Naked Pictures Of Your Mother”, “I Buy The Drugs” and “Chocolate Pope”. Clearly a group begging to be taken seriously on the international political scale.
I was speechless. This world has gone insane, or this country at least. I mean, good grief, the song is called “Gay Bar” for god’s sake, It’s not exactly Byron. I think somebody in the upper eschelons of the BBC must have pulled their pants on too quickly this morning, or at least I hope that’s the reason beause I am losing faith in the world quickly enough without these trifling acts of stupidity.
October 26, 2006
...were I not a stupid humanoid, I could be such a hawt car.
October 18, 2005
What’s the word for being afraid of technology only when it’s in the hands of someone else? That person being my mother...
Exibit A: The MSN extract.
Her: what is this lol
Me: lol = laugh out loud
Me: rofl = roll on floor laughing
Her: I like that
Me: 8-) oh dear, what have i unleashed….
Her: yes I like it
Her: sorry rofl
Her Friend: Please control youself
Yes ladies and gentlemen, inside my mother is a 13 year old AOL spammer just dying to get out and wreak havok on the world. Or at least she will as soon as she learns how to change her name on MSN. Soon the world will be her slimy goop-filled, externally calcified mollusc.
Be afraid… be very afraid…
…Actually picked me up in the marketplace at top B and waved me around in the air. And then apologised to my friend.
why would you do that? I am confusled and befuddled.
Still… great view up there… only I missed most of it due to the shock of suddenly being an extra 4ft taller :s
And i didn't get a monkey either :'(
Ugh. 9am lec tomorrow too. bedtime methinks…
September 16, 2005
Writing about web page http://www.naveljewellery.co.uk/acatalog/Navel_Jewellery_New_Additions.html
Could somebody please tell me why anybody would ever wish to wear a jewelled sperm belly bar. Why, people! Why!
Seriously, what designer sat down and thought
"Hmmm… I think I will base my designs this season on bodily fluids, spunk is sooo 'in' right now."
And what's worse, someone actually listened and decided
"WOW, what an amazing idea."
What about this monstrosity: or a similar beauty, declaring in a rather euphoric script "jism" What is wrong with you all?
My mind fills with disturbing images of unfortunately attired girls with names like shayneesha-babycham-channel Jones, ostentatiously smoking and displaying as much flesh as legally possible. Swathes of pasty-white puppy fat wriggling free from a size 8 top in some violent colour that abuses the retina with it's neon glare. And there, floating like a distant atoll amidst it all, and glowing under the litten tree blacklight like a flare, this misshaped lump of metal announces "Cunt" to the world.
Don't worry sweetie, i'd say it was pretty obvious anyway.
June 30, 2005
- It was such an excellent post that God himself was jealous and sabotaged it.
- It contained material offensive to the FBI/MI5 so they haXX0r3d in and deleted it.
- Someone set us up teh bomb!
- I am retarded and hit the wrong button.
If memory serves me correctly (which it frequently doesn’t) It had this picture in it:
Unfortunately I can deduce no more from the comments except that I am a minor deity ex-brownie-guide professional yogurt opener who does it twice in one day. Rather specific if you ask me…