September 12, 2005

The History of War

…As it was explained to Jen and I in a rather "Mia friendly" manner. Well done Roger!

The History of War.
(insert own hand gestures where appropriate.)

  • Man made
  • Man discovers tools a la "2001 A Space Odyssey"
  • Bludgeoning war ensues
  • Armistice declared by two knackered survivors.
  • Man discovers sharp metal sticks.
  • Lots of little wars with big long sharp metal things.
  • Wars end with discovery of twangy flying pointy sticks.
  • Gunpowder discovered after bizzare manure explosion.
  • Big wars with scary flying things
  • Man discovers how to make flying things explode too.
  • Huge war with everyone using flying explodey things.
  • Man discovers that big firing things can be put on floaty boats and big metal birdy planes.
  • Break for tea, treaties and bankruptcy.
  • Even bigger wars end with small mighty-bangy thingies.
  • Lots are built. They're just used on really really big fields to show off.
  • Peace breaks out.

Yay! now why didn't I do history?!

…oh wait…

…now I remember… the toaster! oh the toasters!!! with the itchy eyes!!!! NOOOoooo…


M xxx

- 5 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

  1. Please remove this post or people will begin to question history students on what the point of them actually is. We have no desire to let people know we are pointless…

    13 Sep 2005, 10:52

  2. If you can ever find a copy, read "The Log" by Craig Charles, explains quite a few concepts in a suitably Lister–esque fashion, the history of maths and dancing are two amuising ones. And yes I do have a copy…

    13 Sep 2005, 14:38

  3. noo history students are in no way pointless, in my experience theyre the only people who can break down the subject enough for me to actually understand it. Though admittedly, using onomatopoeic words and hand gestures does play a big part in my case :)

    You have a copy? hmmmmm how convenient. Would you mind terribly if I kidnapped it for a couple of days?

    15 Sep 2005, 11:05

  4. Of course not, assuming I remember to bring it back with me, it's not normally part of my standard coming back to uni kit

    15 Sep 2005, 17:53

  5. That entry is muchly the funny. Titters were forthcoming, you know.

    20 Sep 2005, 20:03

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