October 24, 2006

Unpretty

I saw an interesting TV show the other day. It was called “Make Me A Supermodel” or “Britain’s Next Supermodel” or “Ain’t I Got A Pretty Face” or something along those lines and I was shocked. Shocked to the core. It wasn’t because of the so called “challenges”; lads – put on some blue eyeshadow; ladies – lie on a pile of frozen fish. But because they all looked so strange. There were two, that everytime they smiled I got this strange urge to go and play the piano, no idea why…
Surely the original idea of a supermodel is someone so ethereal and stunning that you want to just stand there… looking… and… just… wow… oh yeah, remember to breathe too. Do they all really qualify? And these are the ones that have made it past the elimination rounds. Strange.

In unrelated news I taught a giant gingerbread man and peter pan the beauty of the suffix “-to-the-face”. And a lumberjack (not gay) the joyousness of the word “Wench”. Ah good times, good times. :)

M xxx

Edit: In making this post I briefly had to save it and in the interest of haste, mashed out a temporary entry title, not knowing it would be permanent. It amuses me to notice that even after subsequently changing the title, my only ever hot topic post will go down in history as having a title that resembles the word “gayer”. Great. Cruel fate giveth, and cruel fate taketh away…


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  1. stares
    blinks
    stares again

    24 Oct 2006, 23:37

  2. Yo Brack

    25 Oct 2006, 00:04

  3. Mmm, fish…

    25 Oct 2006, 01:51

  4. let’s get together and make beautiful things happen

    25 Oct 2006, 10:29

  5. argh my eyes noooo

    Oh, you didnt mean me.

    Shame.

    25 Oct 2006, 11:15

  6. Nick Howes

    Did Andy just say that?

    25 Oct 2006, 11:25

  7. no

    25 Oct 2006, 18:04

  8. oh. :(

    25 Oct 2006, 21:04

  9. i wrote it, i do enjoy fussing over semantics

    25 Oct 2006, 23:38

  10. Semantics-to-the-face.

    25 Oct 2006, 23:42

  11. Ka-chow! (-to-the-face)
    I would be such an awesome car.
    ...
    oh dear. In a world devoid of human interaction I appear to be going slightly insane(-er).
    disculpa.

    25 Oct 2006, 23:58

  12. you haven’t posted any pictures in a while, you should post a picture of what you’d look like if you were a car.

    26 Oct 2006, 01:16

  13. wu

    he he ,,so what ,I also want to be a superman .

    26 Oct 2006, 04:19

  14. Haha… Andy would be a bubblecar. Siggy would be a tractor… I can’t think of any others.

    26 Oct 2006, 12:10

  15. I’d be some kind of car that was actually God in disguise as a car.

    26 Oct 2006, 14:03

  16. I’d be a car that was actually a robot in disguise.

    26 Oct 2006, 19:19

  17. Sean Connolly

    Moo.

    And I’ll have you know that God and his cat created a robot called Sparky who built the universe from parts bought from a shop in another dimension. There are no cars, bubbly or otherwise.

    26 Oct 2006, 20:06

  18. LOLZ RANDOM!

    26 Oct 2006, 21:00

  19. Heresy! God is clearly an XJ220.

    26 Oct 2006, 21:21

  20. Your definition of God is an XJ220? Thud

    26 Oct 2006, 21:34

  21. What? They’re prrrretty, and I’ve had a scale replica on my desk for as long as I can remember. I’ve grown rather attached to it.

    And yes I know it’s strange for a girl to have grown up with toy cars on display instead of porcelain kittens or whatnot but my dad wanted a boy. When I was three I could name just about every make and model of vehicle on the road. Now I am reduced to Red, Blue, Silver or “Other” :|

    26 Oct 2006, 22:43

  22. I’d be a car that went around trying to be a supermodel, and then everyone would say: Jesus, you’re like, so fat, why don’t you go and chuck up the engine inside your nexus and become acceptable to all in the modelling world, you heffer.
    And then I’d go and die of shame in some car-type way, like let an integral spark plug explode inside me or something, then nobody would learn anything. Nobody would learn anything. Except a reaffirmation of the status quo, that is. Not that that has an influence on what we do. No.

    26 Oct 2006, 22:44

  23. Ok maybe a Ferrari 360 Modena too. and the old XK.

    26 Oct 2006, 22:48

  24. and a Vanquish. I swear that’s the last one.

    I agree Helen, tho surely it would be better to challenge everyone, and once you’d lapped them a couple of times with your “fat” engine, let them be the ones to die of shame…

    26 Oct 2006, 22:55

  25. I still think a car that is actually God is about infinity times cooler than all of your crappy ideas.

    27 Oct 2006, 00:54

  26. How did you all get onto what kinds of (mostly anthropomorphic) cars you would all like to be without first demanding to know what this is all about:

    In unrelated news I taught a giant gingerbread man and peter pan the beauty of the suffix “-to-the-face”. And a lumberjack (not gay) the joyousness of the word “Wench”. Ah good times, good times. :)

    I for one demand elaboration!!

    27 Oct 2006, 03:14

  27. Mia’s always doing crazy shit like that – she’s half Spanish.

    27 Oct 2006, 10:03

  28. Miles, This unfortunate turn of events was triggered by my usage of the word “Ka-chow” from the animated film “Cars” and my subsequent spontaneous inane remark.

    I can only apologise for any distress, trauma, incurable diseases or dismemberment that it has caused you.

    Hughes, yes.

    27 Oct 2006, 11:45

  29. Which half?
    What kind of tires would the Godcar have – white walled?

    27 Oct 2006, 11:59

  30. Aha! I get it! (He doesn’t – ed) :D

    27 Oct 2006, 16:25

  31. The “to-the-face”-ing occured at a fairytale theme party. Hence the lumberjack, gingerbread man and peter pan. I went as “Generic princess” and spent a lot of the night having an Eddie-Izzard-Off with another peter pan while watching the fairy godmother croon over her chocolate fountain and Princess Jasmine wiggle her toes in jellybeans. It was a strange kind of night.

    27 Oct 2006, 18:19

  32. The XJ220 is indeed very pretty – building a replica one is one of my future planned projects (with a tweaked Jag V12, like it should always have had, instead of that nasty twin turbo V6 which was developed from the engine used in the Metro 6R4 rally car, and sounds like a bag of spanners. The thud was from shock. Much kudos to you for knowing your cars though Mia – and four replicas on your desk? There should be more like you!

    27 Oct 2006, 19:20

  33. If only you knew what you’d wished for…

    27 Oct 2006, 23:18

  34. Mwahahahahaha!....
    *ominous music plays in the background*

    28 Oct 2006, 22:28


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