All entries for Friday 06 May 2005

May 06, 2005

Yes I did, but I'm not proud of it.

Follow-up to Oh dear. from Something Random

Yes I am weak and foolish and I ended up in Varsity, with Tom, people-watching but trying to work out just what didn't fit in with the situation – something just wasn't clicking. But I wasn't sure what. Then it dawned on me.

It was a feeling akin to that of standing in a room filled with random people and then suddenly realising that they were all speaking German or Russian or that they all had moustaches, and you just hadn't noticed. It seemed that 90% of the persons present were either a bit younger than me or a lot older; in short, freshers or locals. I didn't recognise a single face, it made me sad. And I felt unnecessarily old.

I don't mind being 20, nothing wrong with it at all, but it feels like I've been given a parking ticket when I don't even drive. It's just caught me unawares. And suddenly I imagined myself to be about 60, and sitting there tut-tut-ing about the youth nowadays, commenting on the silly clothing, irresponsable drinking, and how it used to be so much better when I was a first year, with better music, cheaper drinks and more people.

No more carefree drinking for me it seems – oooh no; I found myself trying to read the vk labels for calorie and nutritional values (apparently none are given) and then looking at the time and pondering the election results (that Tom and I promptly looked up; Lab:4 Con:0 Ld:0 at the time I recall). Then I panicked and my mind turned to more sinister things such as the number of ugly cardigans actually in my possession and my ability to knit. The thought has even occurred to me to abandon the traditional birthday booze-up for a more sedated sit down dinner. I am becoming my mother. It was bound to happen, but I wasn't prepared for it to happen quite so soon.

On a lighter note out washing machine seems to have recovered from its sudden spack-attack and is now emptying normally, this is after it tried to eat an entire load of my washing on saturday, then sat for the rest of the week half-filled with rather fetid smelling soapy water (easily explained by the fact that the load was 50% manky teatowels). Unfortunately we've already informed the landlords, so we're gonna have to follow it up with a rather sheepish "oops we were wrong, sorry" when they are just about to buy a new one.

Apart from no longer facing the prospect of having to do my laundry by hand/on campus I'm also happy about Soul Nation tomorrow. I'm interested to see just how improved it is and if I actually notice a difference. Yes I like Soul Nation, it's one of the few vices I nurture, and tomorrow it will act as my non-birthday birthday party so extra woo. And yay.

Nite all,

M xxx

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