All entries for Thursday 20 January 2005

January 20, 2005

Things I'll never understand [part II]

Writing about an entry you don't have permission to view

This one is mainly for the blokes:

You know when you pee, there's this corkscrew effect in the stream where it twists around a couple of times. Why?

I used to just think that this was because my penis was rifled but I've just noticed a similar effect in the stream of whisky from bottle to glass so perhaps it's natural. Coriolis or something.

There's a thesis in there for some fluid dynamicist.

The ultimate way to reduce the amount you drink

Tonight I have only drunk 7 bottles [As opposed to my usual Thursday intake of 20], using the simple process of staying home and only having 7 bottles in the house.

Stupid head

As it's Thursday, I've been drinking in my room again. So I shouldn't be suprised by the sudden realisation of the best way to end a relationship:

"I'm sorry, but this relationship just isn't working for me anymore. By the way, I pissed on your cat."

I'll have to file this in the "things I've always wanted to say, but have'nt". I'll put it next to "Could you repeat that? I was busy staring at your breasts

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