All entries for Thursday 02 December 2004
December 02, 2004
Tonight. 7:30pm. Earldon methodist church (opposite the City Arms). Brass band & MTW. Xmas themed (but not entirely Xmas, for those of you already sick of it already). Can't remember how much it is to get in. £3 or £4 I think.
Everybody welcome. Come. Listen. Laugh at all the mistakes. Be amazed by the quality that a trophy-winning band can produce. Sing along to the carols. Scowl sullenly at the back if you don't feel like singing. Eat mince pies. Drink refreshments. Win prizes in the raffle.
For the fourth time in the last two weeks, this series of events has occurred:
I have woken up just before my alarm, heard it go off and decided that it was time to get up. Despite that, and the fact that I feel fine and ready to get up (not overly tired or hung over), I don't. Instead I lie in bed with my eyes closed, but not asleep, for up to 3 hours.
I'm wondering if this is a good thing or a bad thing. Obviously it is to my educational detriment and goes against the purpose of doing a degree. But symbolically, what does it mean? Is it merely a show of power by me exercising my right to choose to attend or not? In that case, why don't the times when I do actually attend lectures feel like I'm choosing to go to them, but instead feel like I'm obliged to attend? Is it that I like the comfort and safety my bed provides, and don't want to walk out into the cold, early morning world? Is it because I am trapped by some kind of inertia and it takes a supreme force of will to make me change from my current state? Am I just lazy? Is it because I realise that if I miss that lecture I've got a lot of time I can use to e.g. do the ironing, watch TV, do my assignments, etc. (basically anything except mope around campus with no particular task to do and generally get depressed by the meaninglessness of my own existance)?
Perhaps for thoughts, one should read alcohol.
A brief summary of tonight's thoughts:
1 – Whatever happened to Ascii art?
2 – Explain bitter-sweet joy.
1 is fairly obvious.
For 2, I'd say something along the lines of "it cheers you up in a whole 'that's good, but it does't apply to me' kind of way" which leaves you both gladdened at the thought that it is good, and yet saddened as you do not get to participate nor fully appreciate said goodness.