January 23, 2010

P2 Becoming More Assertive

18th January 2010

Tutor: Bev Walshe

Am I being assertive before this? The answer is NO! That was the main reason for me to attend this worshop. I want to learn the SKILLS and figure out whether I could do it or not.

Passive? Aggresive? These two aspects are part of assertiveness.

Passive:                                                                                        Agressive:

-Easygoing                                                                                    -Rude

-Low self-esteem                                                                          -Outspoken

-Inactive participation                                                                   -Proactive

-Shy                                                                                             -Dominating others

-Quiet                                                                                          -Bossy/ irritating/ annoying

-Low confidence                                                                           -Over self-confidence

Frankly, between these two categories, I fall into the 'Passive' one. I was not confident with myself and I would rather sit down and listen to other people. Sometimes, I would like to contribute too, however, failed to do so when I saw other people are a lot better than me. Besides that, if ever I faced a difficult situation between others and I, I would tend to agree or just follow whatever THEY think is the best. I did not have the courage to stand for my own rights.

Fortunately, this workshop offered me VERY USEFUL TIPS to change my attitude. Firstly, I must be aware of my body posture (eye contact, feet parallel, weight firm, face forward, straight back, level shoulders). Secondly, INTONATION and VOLUME are very essential when we speak to someone. It did not neccessarily to talk 'loud' in order to be assertive. "LEVEL Head, FALLING Tail"- this is a vital concept that everyone must apply. It will give the impact of assertiveness with the least emotional and intentional information. The practices in the workshop really gave me a good chance to see how actually an assertive person looked like.

Furthermore, I found out that those people who are outspoken and assertive are not being rude or mean. It depended on our ways in judging their behaviours. Different individuals would have different perspectives. Therefore, be positive!

Overall, a person who is assertive is the one who can express his/her words and needs without dominating others. Respecting the others is very important and one must be able to negotiate and resolve conflicts/ confrontations that might happen. Those who wants to be assertive also need to be confident and believe in themselves!

--mei ling (0936627)--


- One comment Not publicly viewable

  1. Mary Sage

    Hello again, MIe LIng – like I have just written for P1, this is a very good overview of what you learnt from the workshop, but now you need to make some concrete, practical action points that you are going to try and carry out so that you really do behave in a more assertive way.

    23 Jan 2010, 20:21

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