The Graduate Bar Assignment
Here is week four's assignment, as I understand it:I’m dressed to KO, since I just did the laundry yesterday. My jeans even smell nice. Look out, boys, all your base are belong to me! I look around as I step through the door and see that most of the tables are taken. It’s cool. The situation is under control. I can always ask some good-looking guys to make room for me at their table. Speaking of which, a bishie is at the bar. Perfect. I need to get a drink anyway.
As I approach the bar, another girl, scantily clad, moves up to my guy and flips her hair. I don’t think so. Light-years too early, Rikku-look-alike.
“Hey, do you guys serve synthehol?” I ask loudly at the bar. The bishie turns to look at me. So does Rikku-girl.
“No,” grunts the bar stooge.
“Then I guess I’ll just have to get a coke, thanks.”
“I’m helping someone else right now,” says the stooge, “so you’ll have to wait.” He turns away.
I turn and give the bishie an “oh-brother” smile. He gives a strained smile back. Does that mean he likes me? Does that mean he thinks I’m BIFF? Should I just turn back to the bar and not look at him again? I can see the other girl giggling inanely on the other side of him. I can’t be pwnd like that. She is just too stupid.
“So,” I ask (after all, he smiled back – that is practically an invitation!) “have you ever played Metal Gear Solid?”
Uh-oh. He is the non-communicative type. Does that mean he doesn’t play video games? Or just that he hasn’t played that video game? Is he more into FPS or multiplayer?
“Oh, not a TEAG type of guy, huh? That’s leet.What do you play?”
“Uh… rugby,” he says.
Oh. Oh no. He is one of those “athletic guys.” I met a girl on mIRC who dated an athletic guy once to see what they were like. All he talked about was football. He hadn’t ever played a video game and thought that “html” was a type of sandwich. What’s worse, his idea of a date was to let her watch him work out.
I send the Rikku bimbo a telepathic message that says “He’s all yours” and turn back to the bar.
A short guy in jeans and a t-shirt smiles at me on my right. His shirt says “Old School Education” and has a picture of an SNES on the front. He could be leet.
“Are you the girl who asked for synthehol?”
“Yeah,” I admit, hopefully.
“Does this look anything like Ten-Forward to you?”
“No,” I laugh, “but who knows, the invasion might have happened while I was re-playing FFVII.”
“Oh, a classic!” he says. “I don’t have all my systems here, so I’ve just been re-playing Oblivion.”
“Cool,” I say. Now that I’m talking to a nice guy (could he be some kind of haxor alpha nerd??It’s too early to tell), I don’t know what to say.
“What do you say I buy you your coke and we go over to the stools and talk binary?” he asks.
I want to say “74k3 m3, !m j0v2z!” but I settle with a “Sounds good.” A new bar stooge has arrived and SNES boy orders two cokes while I smile goofily at him. I can’t seem to stop myself.
“I’m Zak, although my real friends know me as ChronoPulley.”
“I’m misashi-j0, aka Sara,” I say as the bar stooge puts our cokes on the counter.