Taxol is taxing!
As previously, I spent a foul week feeling sorry for myself as I started to ache. My legs are particularly bad and I don’t manage to get much sleep. All right for me as I am not working, but my poor husband is also getting sleepless nights as he often keeps me company with a cup of tea in the middle of the night.
Not only is ther the physical pain, like a really bad dose of flu, but I feel quite depressed. I must say it is really helped by acupuncture and also the active chi therapy, like reiki. Both are about building up energy and believe me this chemotherapy uses it up. I have horrible mood swings that my family have to put up with, they are very good.
I still try to do too much when I am feeling OK, and I know I need to rest more. I had some notion of returning to work, but that has been knocked on the head as I am emotionally and physically not ready for it. I have agreed with occupational health that it is unrealistic as I am often tired and emotional, no, I have not been hitting the bottle!
Energy is like a yo-yo, and my brain is somewhere off with the fairies. Some days I find reading really difficult, even the simplest of detectives. It is also frustrating when I can’t do the Sudoku’s I can usually manage. I have to make sure I don’t start things I can’t finish. So very short term goals. I am doing a lot of baking because it is really satisfying and achievable, so our house smells wonderful and I am exploring new recipes. All healthy cakes with organic ingredients. Even the children are eating them.
Another week to go before the next chemotherapy, Number 4, so over half way which will be a relief, although I know the effects are likely to be more intense.
12 Oct 2006 10:09
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Tags: Breast Cancer
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kim
I can so relate to what you’re going through. I just had my third dose of taxol with one more to go. I’m working full-time and often think “what the hell am I doing?” It’s been very difficult. I’m such a “trooper” that people all around me have forgotten that I’m sick. I don’t want to complain all the time, but at the same time, “damn I feel horrible!!” You’re very fortunate to be able to stay at home and not work. Be thankful for that! My madness on this drug is about to get the best of me. I hate you’re going through it too, but it made me feel better to know I’m not alone.
26 Oct 2006, 19:17
Hi Margi, I read through your postings on this subject and can imagine what you have and are going through. Everyday, I think about you, I think about your intellect and human relations. I think of the impact you have made on me and my project, rather our project. I see the image of a strong, determined and self willed woman. I believe that this attitude will see you through this period and this treatment.
I must say, here that you a role model, a star and an embodiment of encouragement. I really missed you and the project does too. Keep fit, get well soon and we all (project team) long to see you again.
Olu
01 Nov 2006, 11:41
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