October 23, 2009

Schism

Twisting and turning in the turbulence
of pseudo drunkenness,
caught in the stony hollows of untold trauma
in a realm where belonging just isn’t in scope
where life seeps through your clutches like fine dust
childhood is a lie upon foundations of illusion
fed by dream pupas who have yet to be ugly moths
your cry is stifled by the oblivion of the masses
voracious scavengers around the feast of your undoing
revenge is your sole refuge
filling the absentia of a soul
a string of sorrow and the portrait of a heart
like a pendent pierced
change like a chameleon
like that lump of worthless clay that forever changes
and retains none of its identity
your world and individuality cease to matter
die within to escape the swamp of your existence
your god died in 30-something AD
pulse beats acrimony
mere existence is suddenly distasteful even in others
you are a shell to be possessed
eager to please you wallow in excrement
closing your nostrils to odious rejection
your intention stuck on a hook
lose yourself in its hypnotic beckoning that is sadistic
and you the masochist beg for more blood to spill
a place beneath a grave stone
away from the despising daggers
that bring you to your knees
a wolf gobbled up by sheep in a twist of fate
your lament is heady, engulfing you in hatred
which affords you strength
you the weakling swallow it eagerly
brave the aches,
you shallow martyr
you are inducted into the fellowship of only yourself
faked dignity afforded by your shallow defiance
clawing at the barbed wire walls
with tearing nails of resolve that break away
to expose the vulnerable bloody flesh
of your hidden sensitivity
the herd now is more appealing
your pride is peeling away like last decade’s paint
just as a painter who paints himself away
too war weary to confront those overwhelming rumors
poison so easily concocted by those
who are gratified daily by your crucifixion
pray to a godless world
for the cease of every painful heart pang
in a directionless destiny
where even stars burn out
the only release afforded is holistic Death
from this the parody of pain

Written in 2006


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