Telephone Hygienists: a reality?
The flu virus can survive on hard surfaces such as telephone handsets. Quick- call a telephone hygienist. Or then again maybe don't... Pick the telephone up in a tissue and then put the tissue straight in the bin. Avoid using a lift whilst waiting for your telephone hygienist and do not shake their hand. Better still- in order to protect yourself fully from infection dig yourself a moat. There is government funding available for such life saving home improvements. Contact your local government office by phone on 08...
Catch it, kill it, bin it, burn it. Curse the ashes then dispose of them. Do not dspose of ashes in your bin. For free advice on disposal of flu ridden ashes please call the, oh forget it... :)
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