Me: On why I hate dirty Chav scum type peoples…

I HATE Chavs.

Especially the grubby arseholes who spit – because it is VILE AND DISGUSTING and if I was brave enough (and had a balaclava on) I would kick them in the NADGERS! There just is no need to spit – I blame their parents – they’re obviously cretins – well what more can I say!

Also, what is it with the sports clothing – there are other fabrics on the market now, some of them quite nice, and that don’t rustle like a carrier bag when you walk. Whilst there are also some nice shoes about, brown ones, black ones, canvas and leather ones – see – your obsession with white trainers just isn’t justified – go on (at the risk of sounding like Jamie Oliver…) – TRY SOMETHING NEW TODAY!

Oh, and while I think of it – you don’t have to speak like you have a pair of socks in your mouth all the time- it is ok to ARTICULATE your vowels, and it’s not a crime to do it to your consonants either. Fell free to pepper your words with T’s, which you DON”T have to miss out you know! It isn’t “WAH-EVA” – It’s WHAT EVER” – you see the T there – SEE IT!

I’m nearly done – but not quite – have you also noticed how Chavs swagger – it’s supposed to make them look cool and “hard” – actually, it just makes you look like you’ve shat yourself and you’re waddling like a penguin to a toilet so you can empty your pants before it runs down your leg.

Urgh – I DISPAIR – rant over.

: 15 Jan 2007 19:50 |  Comments (3) |  Report a problem