I’ve been in Brum just over a year now, and its gone so fast and I feel like I haven’t accomplished enough. Need to make a list. Always helps…
Favourite blogs for Jonathan's Blog
July 23, 2007
May 25, 2007
Writing about web page http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/6687089.stm
I think Trafalgar Square looks much better covered in grass, but I wonder how long it will be before someone’s dog leaves a massive steaming heap of turd and the owner neglects to clean it up?
March 07, 2007
I went home these past few days as it was my little brothers birthday, and much cider and beer drinking was needed as a result.
Whilst not drinking or eating I sorted through some old school books and paper from primary school, and I found that almost every planned story I wrote involved either witches or shrinking, or in one particualarly creative occasion I combined the two.
Speaking to friends it seemed that shrinking was the subject of some of their stories too, or meeting a dog.
I just wondered wether there was some popular book around at the time that inspired the creative talents of a young generation?
The witch influence definitely came from books. The Colin and Jackie Hawkins books in particular. I loved them. Monsters, Witches, Vampires and Pirates. And I always felt safe on the family visit to Irealnd because according to the Vampires book, the Irish Vampires didn’t drink blood, but ate shamrock.
March 02, 2007
I saw 2 ducks in the fountain in Victoria Square today. It made me laugh so much. I love ducks.
February 21, 2007
This. by the way. is a nit-picking entry about nothing important.
In that Tres Emme advert (or however it’s spelt) that hairdresser guy voiceover says something along the lines of “clients ask me if all that heat ffries their hair. And I say ‘no’” Then as this is being said they cut to a close up of the hairdresser guy. He doesn’t say no. It looks more like a non-committal “nearghm” or a “nyermh”.
February 19, 2007
After getting a shiney, shiney camera for Christmas I went a bit mad and took loads of photos, some good, some bad and some downright ugly. Hundreds of them.
Then as I went to show someone the snowfest that was Birmingham the camra told me it had a memory card error. Bollox.
Now I don’t know what to do because all the card readers I have tried refuse to accept that there is a memory card full of photos in it.
Does anyone know if my pictures are doomed to remain on the card or is there some super-dooper method to get my ugly pictures back? Should I just keep trying different readers?
December 15, 2006
We bought a little tree yesterday and decorations.
Some of the decorations are covered entirely in glitter.
Now I keep finding bits of glitter on me.
December 01, 2006
A while a go a pigeon came into the centre. He didn’t pay.
I saw the pigeon walking around the entrance to work, occasionally looking in… I think he wanted to learn things… so we shouldn’t have been surprised when it walked through the door and flew up to the top of the building. For several reasons it was decided that the pigeon couldn’t stay, so ideas were proposed the best way to get it.
Ideas suggested were the original Crewe catching method (not actually sure if it has ever been sucessful), talking to the pigeon in the same “coo coo” way (I think they were from different parts of the country), tempting it with bread on a plate (pigeon was a fussy eater), throwing bread towards it, throwing plastic starfish to try and scare it away (he was fearless), or hiring a falcon(bit difficult at short notice).
Eventually they called rentokill… who magically solved the problem…
November 29, 2006
Pigeon poo is apparently very good for plants as it is very nutritious.
At Shrewsbury railway station I saw a guy drinking his coffee/tea out of one of those styrofoam cups. As he moved his cup away and began to look for when his train was, a pigeon on one of the beams above him released an arse-load of shite, that landed in the centre of this fellas drink.
Some of the drink slopped out of the cup and onto the mans hand, causing him to look at his drink. Then he looked up. He saw the pigeon, looked down at his cup… looked up…looked down… and from where we were sitting you could see the realisation dawn. Muttering to himself, probably about how much he hates pigeons, he threw his drink away deciding that despite it being rich in nutrients it was not for him.
November 28, 2006
On one of my many train adventures, I got talking to this auld fella and it came up that I was from Crewe. He got to talking about the only person he’d ever previously met from Crewe was in a factory sat with a box propped up on a stick, above some bread, and some string tied to the stick… cartoon stylee, illustrated below. When he asked what he was doing he said he was trying to catch a pigeon that had flown into the building.
Now I thought this was something that only ever happened in said cartoons or comedy films… but then I was told by boyf that he had seen some kids on his way to my house trying to catch some pigeons using the same method… so maybe it happens in cartoons and Crewe…
November 12, 2006
I went out tonight with a load of family and family to be. It was nice, but I drank a load of stuff that I don’t normally drink and now I am very, very sleepy, though not too drunk.
Due to todays events it occurred to me that quite a few people I know have pigeon anecdotes… Over the next few days I might add some of those that I have heard.
Peace out you crazy pigeon watchers
November 03, 2006
Each morning at the work team brief someone is required to give a “fishy fact”, I’m not entirely sure why this is. It might be because one of the aims of the centre is education, or it might just be because headoffice says we have to… anyway my fact was this:
The irish word for jellyfish translates into english as seal snot
...really it’s seal mucus, but snot is a kind of mucus I figured, and it sounds better. I like that fact.
October 30, 2006
I saw a pigeon with reeeeeally short legs today. Just thought I’d mention it.
October 06, 2006
Tea is good. So very good.
I like tea. With biscuits. Or jam on toast.
October 03, 2006
I’m going to put up some pictures of my trip to Galway. I was away for a few weeks, a few weeks ago. And it was fun.
The first week the weather was fantastic and completely the opposite of the weather forecast, but then the second week Carraroe was covered by cloud, lashed with rain and received winds from the tail end of hurricane George, as crazy TV3 weatherman had said it would be. It was still nice to be there though.
On one of our coastal walks we met these two:
Hopefully will make it there next year too.
Tóg go bog é!
October 01, 2006
The first letter demanding council tax arrived, and it really struck that I am no longer a student. It also made me angry. OK, so I get angry without much provocation but reasons why the letter made me go grrrrr:
1) It means I am no longer a student.
2) They claimed it was a reminder, gave me 7 days to reply and covered it in red ink.
3)They addressed the letter to Miss K Bray. K!?!
Reason 1 isn’t really their fault, and I suppose if I am that desparate I could save up and do a Masters in something vocational and useful and thus return to studentdom.
Reason 2 might not be their fault, as the initial bill may have got lost in the post, so they thought I hadn’t replied, but the overuse of red ink gave it a threatning edge… though not to the same extent as TV liscensing… but the seven days was a bit unpractical as I had dissapearded acroos the sea. But when I rang up they said ignore this letter because we hadn’t recieved the first one.
Reason 3 must be their fault. Because we didn’t recieve any previous letters I am presumbing that they got my name from the electoral register. This means that they got the information from something I wrote. Now, I am not the greatest speller, I freely admit it. Just reading this blog is evidence that it’s a bit crap at best, but I am sure that I can spell my own name, and I am sure that my handwriting isn’t so bad as to make a C look like a K. So reason three is due the the sheer incompetance of somebody working for the council and I think I am allowed to be annoyed… and sod you if you don’t agree.
Ofcourse now it is all sorted they are resending the letters in a less threatning manner to Miss C Bray I am no longer angry. But I going to see what my council tax gets me and check if I’m getting my moneys worth…
September 03, 2006
I know you shouldn’t… but I did. I applied nail varnish right before going out. But I didn’t apply a thin veneer, I applied a big thick blob and then preceeded to spread it all over myself and around the flat.
However if you decide to do this, ideally you should have a friend who can put a small amount on that will dry quickly, and will be willing to help you hold bags and keys with out smearing nail colour everywhere.
But I had a good night despite the dodgey nailvarnish on my left hand.
August 31, 2006
Today I had chocolate cake for breakfast. It was TESCOs finest chocolate indulgence… or something along those lines.
And it was good.
August 18, 2006
Yesterday we went for lunch and then went shopping. And it is true that when you go shopping on a full stomach you don't crave all the junk food because you just don't feel like eating it.
However I found myself being drawn to homeware shelves and found myself reasoning the possibilities of a loaf–tin… I have NEVER cooked bread before EVER, but was thinking about buying a loaftin… it may have been the alcohol consumed previously, but I thought it was weird.