We wish you a Merry Christmas
Earlier this evening came an unexpected knock at the front door. I peeked out the curtains to see a couple of young chav lads leaning against the wall just outside. They must only have been 13 years old or so. I opened the door to be greeted by the most god-awful, lacklustre rendition of We wish you a Merry Christmas you could ever have the bad luck to hear. No smiles, no effort, and one of them remained slumped against the wall whilst ‘singing’.
I laughed, shouted “That’s enough!” and gave them a quid (well, why not? – the incident amused me). They thanked me and swaggered off.
Less than 5 seconds later the knock came again. It was another pair of chav lads, roughly the same age. An almost as bad chorus of Merry Christmas began again.
“No chance,” I said “I’ve just had your mates here this second.”
“Alright mate”, they politely said, “Happy Christmas anyway” and wandered off.
Cheeky little sods.