May 20, 2005

Calm And Relaxed…

… no I'm not. I'm calm but never relaxed. Driven, as my life is, purely by a combination of indignation, self righteousness, panic and paranoia, I cannot relax. Ever. But for now I am calm in the face of impending examinations as this is the only rational response.

Yesterday I had my first library funny turn of the revision period which was remedied by the simple expediency of running-the-fuck-away. Curiously this exam stress has manifested itself in more gratuitous swearing than this blog usually sees. Don't ask why. Anyway, today, a declared "No Revision" day has gone so well I might actually do some revision if only because the thought of it does not currently make me want to coagulate. In fact I want to use big words. I promise I will stop using them soon. I have been warned on more than one occasion by a certain housemate that sometimes it isn't possible to have a conversation with me without recourse to a dictionary. I told him to stop being such a science student.

In any case… could any readers from Yorkshire just tell me if an attempt to run someone over is actually a way of saying a friendly hello in Yorkshire? It's the only reason I can think of that would prompt one of my so-called tennis playing friends to try to mow me down earlier. Actually it's not the only reason. Damn.

You know who you are.


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  1. It is a proper Yorkshire greeting Hol, although only if you get what Bill Bryson calls a "Malhamdale wave", with the slight raise of one hand from the wheel and no other acknowledgement.

    20 May 2005, 20:09

  2. Must have been trouble int' mill.

    Or at least that's the excuse I get from my Yorkshire relatives when fleeing their bastard half-southern family members.

    So in conclusion, I think they're all like that. Though I believe it's largely considered as merely part of having a 'dry' sense of humour… Hmm.

    20 May 2005, 20:20

  3. amamDUH

    ha ha ha ha ha….................. all I can say is the look on your face Hol, before you realised it was us, was priceless. Tell me, do all History students roam around Leamington looking so constantly perplexed!?

    20 May 2005, 20:25

  4. We do when there's the ever present danger of eing run over by lawyers! I'll sue, you know I will!

    20 May 2005, 20:57

  5. Friend of the so-called tennis player but not from Yorkshire

    Yes, it was classic. Thank you for totally making my day Holly. Your face…I wish I had a camera!

    20 May 2005, 20:58

  6. So now I know what will cheer me up if I'm feeling a little blue. Try and run Holly down. Ace!

    21 May 2005, 00:18

  7. Mmm, I can't believe I'm being good to you after what you did to me (oh, the trauma) but amanDUH and Friend of the so-called tennis player but not from Yorkshire you may be interested to note that I have a new gallery of certain birthday related madness from earlier in the month.

    Natalie Don't do anything they judge to be a good idea. Once you've met them you'll understand.

    21 May 2005, 01:17

  8. amanDUH

    I particularly like the succession on 'normal' (if you can say that) Geishas until you hit photo number 16…...very amusing!

    21 May 2005, 11:20

  9. Gordon R

    The Ninja sword is definitely an improvement on the rather small knife you showed us before.

    21 May 2005, 12:10

  10. The irony of course is that the ninja sword is now broken after a duel between myself and Boz ended in me losing.

    21 May 2005, 13:45

  11. It was a good ninja costume all round though

    21 May 2005, 14:13

  12. Gordon R

    Have you not learnt anything from films? Just as the evil character is about to plunge their sword into the hero/heroine (in this case- you). The hero/heroine remembers the small dagger-like knife they have hiding in their boot that their loved one gave them many moons ago after having proclaimed they can't be together as he/she is promised to someone else. So the evil character gets a sharp stab in their spleen and promptly dies and then long-lost lover runs out of the bushes were he/she was hiding all along. Happy reunion of long-lost lovers until hidden lover realises evil character was actually her/his brother/sister. Enter moral dilemma – stay true to family loyalty and claim vengance on dead sibling, or run off with lover (preferably on a bike, well I would) because at least you'll get laid.
    The choice….is yours.

    21 May 2005, 14:16

  13. amanDUH

    When I said picture 16 in the last comment I ACTUALLY meant picture 12 with Scary Geisha!!

    21 May 2005, 14:17

  14. Andy Cheers.
    amanDUH I knew which one you meant. I think we all knew. Scary…
    Gordon I have no bike. This is why I have many many exes, whose relatives I've killed in combat, after me. Damn this complicated life.

    I'm gonna watch the FA Cup final…

    21 May 2005, 14:57

  15. Gordon R

    Holly, dear, you make your life complicated!
    I would offer you a loan of a bike but, alas, sadly ours was sold many years ago. No more burning rubber for me down on skid row.

    21 May 2005, 15:19

  16. FA Cup final… damn.

    21 May 2005, 18:04

  17. Gordon R

    Not gone well?

    21 May 2005, 19:36

  18. Dave the Cardboard Box

    Did you wear black watching the game or just after the result? Anyway, on the dictionary theme I salute your indefatigability!

    21 May 2005, 22:21

  19. Being a neutral, I'll happily concede that Man U deserved to win, nevertheless, it is always somehow perversely enjoyable to watch Ronaldo cry; plus he takes penalties like a chump with his stupid cocky run-up. Rooney may be a bit of a thug but at least he took his penalty pretty awesomely.

    23 May 2005, 00:03

  20. I loved Rooney's penalty. No grace, no finesse, just wellying it as hard as possible. Save that!

    23 May 2005, 07:58

  21. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA THAT PICTURE OF SHEARNY IS CLASSIC!!!!

    23 May 2005, 15:11

  22. can you get up a gallery of mine and boz's party up ASAP????!!!

    23 May 2005, 18:44


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