All entries for February 2006
February 18, 2006
Wake up saturday morning, late. coz I finished work at 4ish this morning.
Called Soo, started as how she did in her interview and now I am here crying so badly…
I dunt want to quit the job, because i like the people: Manny, Roman, Ajay, Soo Ann, William, David, C.e, Sophia, Hamid, Abdule. Manny is like a sweet big sister, she cheers me and and treating me nice; Roman is knowing everying, like gambling but working hard and enable his team finish cleaning up quickly; Ajay is a very harding working, reliable, lovely person with a super kind heart, he says that he likes washing, but I know he just too kind to leave the heavy job to the others; Soo Ann is like a little sister, but she is so mature and independent, I didnt achieve what she have now when i was at her age; William is just very nice, smart, hard-working guy, he always help and leaves no mess behind; David, he is quiet but if you are nice to him, he'll be nice to you as well, and his smile is very sweet; C.e is little, kind, but good to work with; Sopia is straight forwards, need regular sleep; Hamid and Abudle is no longer in Battered, but they were such nice person~ miss them so much. I even like the "John English", although he was 'silly', never know how to prioritize his work. but he has a kind heart and he makes funny "I~" noise. All of them are caring and we work like a team, we deal with the hardship together and we cheering each other up..
But all of these will be destroyed, and I might have to leave all these nice people because of BLOODY white chick.
I was felt bad about that group email thing, but now, I dunt care about it any more.
Throughout my life untill now, I did met some very mean people, and I had been treated unfairly, also had people that I thought they were my best friends talking insane behind my back at my early ages, when i started work, the worst experiences that I had included had ice cream thrown on my face when I was serving food, had somenone ridiculous cursing and spit at me… but doesnt matter how bad I was the situation was, I managed to learn from it and become more and more stronger. I never lose faith in human being, I am tring to be a man of understanding, I find excuses for people when they are making mistakes, I am trying my best to make the others happy and I hate to bother or trouble my friends~~
Guess now, I am meeting another milestone of my experience with mean people.
I really, cant stand on her. I was trying hard to be nice to her but she is the type of people which I will never be able to get along with! I dunt hate people because they are not nice to me, but I will if they are treating my friends with no respect and mean. I was hope and willing to make it up, even she is such a incomplete thing, I would give her chances. But the fact is telling me, she dunt deserve it.
I have the "Equal Opportunity" Sign on my Battered T-Shirt, but do you really think that the EQUAL truly exist?! when a white rumormonger is always believed by the managers and all her non-british colleagues get dismissed or investigated. I doubted.
I will leave Battered sooner or later coz I am graduating, god bless the nice people and you ever come across to buy food in Battered, be nice to the staffs, they are working under pressures and long hours, customers shall learn to respect their public servant as well. They could be students who are working hard to earn some extra cash, so they do not have to ask money from their parents; they may be father of 2 children, they are working hard to feed and support the life of their family.
Nobody leads a easy life, not everyone get paid as high as an investment banker, but if they are kind to you, they deserve you to treat them nicely as well.
February 02, 2006
I am now I am clear about everything. I am a honest, kind and straight individual. I dont like seeing people be mistreated, neither myself. I stepped and announced my opinion, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with it. I shouldn't blame myself for anything, I am a human being, and I cannot hold eveything insides me. It is right to let things out and I am happy to accept any comments or complains, and listen to the words from the other people.
I thought a leader or a strong person, should be less emotional invloved when they in business, and I was trying to become one of them. The fact is, I am emotional and integrity. I cannot seat back and watch things go wrong, see people get hurt, see job not get done in a proper way. I can never, at least not now, hold my thoughts and pretent that I dont care.
So tomorrow, I will just be myself, talk out my concerns and what happend between me and her. I actually feel better, when I have accepted the fact that I am a emotional, soft heart, sentimental person. I may become strong one day, but to myself, now, I shouldnt push myself so hard, want to be exceptional good all the time.
confident, never let it go off you, babe. Things turn pretty when you accept and like the way they are. in another word, be natural, be yourself.