All entries for Sunday 05 February 2006

Road rant 2

I generally do not have a problem with cyclists on the road. The following rant applies to a very small minority, and that suicidal chav whom I nearly collided with just outside Leamington

(.... yes, he's a chav, baseball cap, OTT jewelery, brand name sports wear, and he even has his tracksuit bottoms tucked into his adidas socks. Okay, I'm just very observant…).

Rule #1
You're still a road user just like all other vehicles on the road. The highway code doesn't explicitly apply to motor vehicles. If you approach a give way marker …. GIVE WAY.

Rule #2
If you fail to give way, and end up zooming so fast around the corner directly in front of a car travelling on a 40 mph road, consider yourself lucky if you're still on your bike, and expect a loud horn coming up your rear.

Rule #3
Do not …. and I repeat… DO NOT stick your middle finger or some profane gesture in retaliation. The simple message is "BECAREFUL YOU FOOL!" … it's YOUR fault … learn from it and don't do it again.

Rule #4
Do not continue to stare at the driver behind you, who spared your life and waving your middle finger for a further duration of 5 seconds. Particularly when you're approaching a red light at a cross junction.

Now, if for some ridiculous reason you broke ALL of the rules above, the following outcomes may proceed to happen:

Outcome #1
The driver may sooo willingly be happy to run you over.

Outcome #2
Approaching the cross junction, and another vehicle from the side might run you over, or they'll slam on the brakes and beep their horn loudly at you. You will break Rules #1 and #2 again, and potentially #3 and #4 if you're still mentally retarded.

Outcome #3
You avoided a near-death traffic accident.

In my particular scenario, the outcome was #3 …

: 05 Feb 2006 17:06 |  Tags: Chav Code Cyclist Highway Road |  Comments (1) |  Close comments |  Report a problem