July 08, 2005

I Kissed Dating Goodbye

… a long time ago, but now I've read the book. For non-Christians out there, it's not some kind of cheesy, I-don't-need-men/women manual. It's just cheesy. But anyone who cares knows that already. I'd wanted to read it for ages, and as Prinith said the other day, all the ideas I'd expressed to her were pretty much in line with Josh Harris' thinking. So I pretty much had to read it.

Turns out she was right. In spite of the strong odour of brie, the book did come close to expressing how I think God expects us to act in relationships. Although I think if a man asked my parents if it was ok for him to start pursuing marriage with me, they might fall over laughing. But better to be safe than sorry, and if a potential husband is going to have to deal with my parents for the rest of his life, he may as well start now by dealing with them finding him hopelessly backward.

I write this having had my nan just send me a note concluding: "Be true to yourself, have a happy time, perhaps a Prince Charming"... which is not unusual for her. But even my mother, who is normally a stay-away-from-men-they-will-only-ruin-your-life type started quizzing me about love interests yesterday. I'm moving to France! Get it into your heads people!

But most of all (turns up nose in self-important style), I have kissed dating GOODBYE!

- 3 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

  1. Bohdan Brumerskyj

    Hi. Just searnhing the web for stuff on Josh Harris, came across your blog for 8th July 2005. Your comment about your parents laughing was quite interesting. I have only just begun reading the book, however there is a young girl 16years of age who I having feelings for. I haven't talked with her about it or discussed it with her and I don't plan on it for some time. However I did discuss it and talk with her parents regarding my feelings and my beliefs. They are in my church of course and I have to say they weren't so much laughing as absolutely shocked and quite nervous. We went ot our local coffee shop and grabbed a cuppa after prayer meeting and just discussed me, my feelings, their beliefs, what they ahve taught their children and 3 hours later we left. If I can suggest anything to any other male it is to actually try doing what I did and what Josh Harris suggests and talk with the parents, they will respect you more, and be more willing to accept you into their home as a friend with a vested interest in their family. If things don't work out they don't. But accountability with her parents is one of the greatest tools ever.

    27 Sep 2005, 14:46

  2. Thank you whoever deleted Matt Manion's offensive comment for me… but is there any way these kind of comments can get deleted before they are directed striaght to your inbox? Anyway, Matt you should know better. I think you are perfectly aware of the tone of what I wrote…

    29 Dec 2005, 17:17

  3. Steve

    Well there are pros and cons of what he mentions in his book. Some of the problems I have with what he teaches is that many times a “one size fits all” approach is taken with this. Something that is designed for teenagers and may work well for them isn’t necessarily appropriate for older single adults. In the past especially when this concept was first introduced you could usually tell where this policy existed. The brothers and sisters were avoiding each other including friendships and one would almost think they were afraid of each other. This leading to a lack of healthy relationships with the opposite sex is not good.

    If one wants a policy like this to successfully work then there need to be a number of group activities going on.

    Many times the pastors hear what they want to hear when a church has a policy like this. They only hear how good it is going vs. the problems.

    27 Apr 2007, 16:11

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