well now everyone, i am now an ordained minister of the universal life church, california. unfortunately i didn't get a certificate, but here's the text of the email i received, so you'll just have to believe me:
This is to confirm that
49 CHESHAM STREET
WARWICKSHIRE COVENTRY CV31 1JS UK
has been ordained as a minister of the Universal Life Church, Modesto, California.
Date of Ordination: 4/5/2005
by Kevin Andrews, Pastor
apparently, i am now authorized by the church to perform the rites and ceremonies of the church (except circumcision), including weddings, funerals, baptisms and blessings and i am committed to always do the right thing.
what more can i say?