All entries for Tuesday 05 April 2005

April 05, 2005


okay, gordon random, this one's for you.
i haven't got too much news right now apart from the fact that i have a shitheap of work to do, but i should share with you the fact that i received some very interesting emails this morning. one was inviting me to join the criminal justice department (isn't it a bit of a worry that lawyers, police and doctors are being recruited via email?); one was from 'chiqia brassard' and read simply 'angley chaston'; and one contained only this picture:

that's pretty messed up right there.
anyway, gordon has requested that i post something involving the following:

"flapjack crumbs
a robin
a girl
man with stupid long hair that doesn't suit him

so i'm going to write a short poem involving all these things:

"Oh, man with long hair,
why your hair be so long?
Can't you see how stupid it looks?
You'd look much better with a short back and sides,
And then maybe the pigs would start finding you more attractive.

You could cover your shirt in flapjack crumbs,
Balance a robin delicately upon your newly-shorn head,
Attach a stapler to your key ring to make it look as if you drive a Chevrolet,
And wear some yellow goggles.
And then that girl who says she likes you a lot, but isn't 'in the right place for commitment right now', but yet still keeps on flirting with you, and you think she likes you but you're not sure, so you try and make a move but then she backs off, and then you apologise and then she won't bring it up but you can feel the tension rising between you –
You know that girl? –
She'll go out with you.

April 2005

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