June 28, 2006

What a world Im leaving…

I finally had my last shift at Asda, was weird leaving the place for the last time. Got met by well–wishers when I started and a leaving present plus got a personal invitation to a celebration dinner from the GSM, which was nice. They claim they'll miss me, and are about the only ppl who have said they'll stay in touch. Guess I did never fit into the university class of people. Tomorrow they're taking me for a celebration/leaving do, which goes to show how much I was liked in the place… even if university students never saw me in the same light. Though I can say that its reported back to me that even one of the coldest people towards me was touched by the sentiments I displayed in a best wishes kinda letter. I know I have a tendency to upset ppl, and its mainly in my inherent ability to speak the truth as I see it. It feels weird that Im going home with no plans other than building a garage and shed before refitting the roof. Its also weird that so many people who I know dont like me will be dearly missed purely down to the fact I have no way to change their opinions of me now. I put a lot of my mistakes down to outside interference and to be honest Ive always had an excuse for things, but now Im finding your actions prove a lot about who you are. Id like to think Im a good person, and my lasting guilty conscience over several things in uni kinda shows that to me, coupled with my need to prove myself to others. But proving myself is one thing, I do it by asserting my beliefs and trying to show them in a good light, I guess the big problem is I'll never change who I fundamentally am. As one lecturer said to me, "Your too hard on yourself", and I guess I am but as a stride into the big wide world, I know I am satisfied with who I am and what Ive become. I think university has made me a stronger person, and despite the moralising and condemnation of myself in places in this blog I get to the point I was trying to make in the first place.

So long everybody, best of luck in the real world, its been a blast with ups and downs, but no doubt some great years, great memories and best of all great friends to share the times with. Everyone I know will do amazingly in the professional lifestyle, hard workers one and all and though I will never say goodbye, I bid adieu to friends, associates, workmates and all Warwick people alike who have made my time here special.

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