April 05, 2005

The re–education of menfolk

Follow-up to The re–education of womenfolk from Dan Lawrence's Blog

Sick of never having anyone to sex you up good? Noone to hold during the scary bits in Jurassic Park? A complete lack of suitable female compatriates to snuggle with?

Menfolk of the hetrosexual persuasion, cease your complaining. It seems that if you aren't getting many dates and you want them then there must be something wrong with you. Wait! Don't run off into an ecstacy of self pity. Come back here and learn, you don't have to be an arse to get plenty of love from the ladies.

Your two weapons are self-love (for once I'm not talking about wanking, though of course it fills in those lonely evenings) and not being beigely boring.

Noone likes ugly, boring things. AWESOME (what? there hadn't been one for a while). If you think you look like an ugly man freak and you feel that everything you do is ungraceful and awkward, stuttering and incompetent; this will be a self fulfilling prophecy. Do you like to sort your paper clips? STOP IT If you're so boring you even bore yourself (quick check, if left alone with yourself do you sit around saying "I'm bored. I'm soooooooo bored" while sitting on your arse?" you're probably pretty boring if even you can't stand to spend time with yourself) then you have to make change. Yes, its not too late; you can become interesting. Take up a few hobbies, watch a few challenging films, read some challenging books, let yourself go now and again, take a joy in living.

Your homework is reading Nietzsche and trying to smile at any girls you think are pretty and hold their gaze before moving on.


- 17 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

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  1. Dan – Awesomely bringing people together since 1983.

    05 Apr 2005, 13:47

  2. A pretty girl

    Ok – that was self-opined. Please all men out there, just smile at me. Go on, I won't bite. I'll probably smile back, maybe pout a bit, and you will have made my day.

    Flash us those gnashers!!!

    05 Apr 2005, 13:52

  3. I try to smile at people all day anyway, it'd be nice if some of them smiled back!

    05 Apr 2005, 14:28

  4. I can't help being nice, it's too natural. But I want to be confident too, make me confident please.

    05 Apr 2005, 14:59

  5. I had a dream where Neitzsche was dressed up like a clown.

    Or maybe that was just a lyric…

    05 Apr 2005, 15:08

  6. *dances*

    05 Apr 2005, 15:10

  7. I'm thoroughly boring and caked in layers of partially congealed self-loathing. Fortunately, I don't really want a girlfriend either, so being disturbingly unattractive doesn't actually bother me. Even I try and smile at people, though. Before they run away, at least.

    Why Nietzsche? Did he get a lot of girls?

    05 Apr 2005, 15:33

  8. No, Colin, philosphers as a rule don't get girls. Hence why they have time to philosophise.

    I smiled at two people today both of whom smiled back as if they knew me. One waved. I have no idea who either was…

    05 Apr 2005, 15:55

  9. Nietzsche is all the self confidence and taking joy in life. At least in the writings if not the man himself.

    05 Apr 2005, 16:06

  10. Also you may have to sidestep the wild disdain of women to get the most out of it :)

    05 Apr 2005, 16:07

  11. Oh and for Andy some questions.

    Are there any men who you think are or look 'cool' ? Do you look or behave like any of these cool people you like? Do you think you have some kickass outfits? Do you make sure you are the first on the dancefloor? Do you have the mental strength to just occasionally put aside what everyone might think of you and let go?

    These things are confident. Stand for election in a society. Ask a girl you find pretty for her phone number before building up elaborate calculations about whether it will work out, in fact screw that thats probably too advanced just go up, say hello and introduce yourself.

    05 Apr 2005, 16:15

  12. I tend to think most people look cool as they have an overall appearance that worls well. I rarely think the same of me.

    05 Apr 2005, 16:51

  13. You don't necessarily have to feel confident inside, as long as you look confident. To a point of course, not to go to the lengths of just being cocky.

    Also, empathise.

    05 Apr 2005, 18:42

  14. Sorry when I say look confident, I'm referring to outward behaviour rather than just appearance. You can look like a squirrel dressed in a gherkin costume and still exude confident behaviour.

    05 Apr 2005, 18:44

  15. Empathy is easy, but it's useless without confidence.

    05 Apr 2005, 20:02

  16. I'd totally do Nietzsche.

    06 Apr 2005, 01:28

  17. These are all very good points, however you're skirting around the main question that its in everybodies mind: "Who is to be the next pope?", find out with Pope Idol

    06 Apr 2005, 13:28


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