All entries for Thursday 31 March 2005

March 31, 2005

Awesome Icons: John McClane

As I was flicking through the television channels last night I came across a classic movie straight out of '88 that ramps up the action to hi-octane levels. I realised, as the pyrotechnic, blood soaked glory unfolded before me, that striding through the smoke and shattered lungs of his enemies was another of our hallowed, awesome icons: John McClane.

The film is called Die Hard for a reason; this guy just doesn't drop. He gets blown across the room by C4, kicked hard in the face more times than I could count, shot full force in the back, jumps off a building with only a fire hose wrapped round his waist (a move that, by all physical laws, should have broken him in two) and has to run across broken glass barefoot. Despite all this he still continues to prod buttock and spout one liners in a distinctly heroic fashion; even overcoming the nearly equally awesome Hans Gruber, the devilish mastermind behind his torment.

The thing I really like about Die Hard is how it pretends to be a christmas film despite the copious guts and swearing. Even fading out in the end to jaunty holiday music. Ingenious ingenuity.

The awesomeness of McClane was confirmed in the two following sequels in which he also failed to die, while blowing the hell out of all kinds of bad guys. He even blew up a whole plane.

Yippy-ki-yay, motherfucker

Awesomeness points: 69/100


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