All entries for Tuesday 10 May 2005

May 10, 2005

Arrr! There be treasure!


One of my favourite things, as regular readers may have noticed. I like the mystique and swagger of the pirate life, the lingo and the wildness.

All of it appeals.

So naturally when called upon to produce a present for a recent birthday, there was but one choice, and that be the pirate's booty of choice; the treasure chest!

Captain Deadeye's Guide to building your own treasure chest

Avast, ye scurvy dogs! If you want to be buildin' yer own pirate treasure chest then ya have to get the right weapons for tha' task.

This is me' beauty:

Cheaper than me parrot, it has all a first mate be needing to keep his planks nice and firm. Somethin' you'll be needing when you start sawing yer raw wood pieces into the right shapes fer yer chest.

Which'll look a little like this:

No good pirate leaves his cabin with out a fine blade by his side, ya never know when you'll need to slice a bilge rat from head to toe. Ha! This little number came from me favourite quartemasters over at the 'Earlsdon Toolbox'. When you've got yer pieces sliced nice and ship shape they'll be looking just so:

Thats yer basic shape of all the sides from the lid down to the base. The next task be slicing the pieces in ta fourty five degree angles so they'll stick together nicely. A nice angle measuring contraption can greatly facilitate the process and seperates ya Blackbeards from ya cabin boys. The tricksiest angles be on the lid. Observe:

Here ye want the sides of the lid to stick together at fourty five degrees but the top (and sloping edges) is t' be filled with slats and instead be needing a nice square piece taking out for the slats to fit in all smooth like.

Arr! That be the right way lad!

If ya cutting be not as smooth as ye be liking ye may need to fill in the gaps between the slats with some wood filler, something ye can pick up from the craven pigswine at ya local 'Homebase'.

When you have cut up all the pieces, including a nice bottom for the base of yer chest, ye be ready for gluing. Gluing requires a bit of patience as ye have to wait for it all to dry together, being pirates ye can speed things along a bit with some sturdy nails:

Awesome. When everything is dry ye be needing to sand it all down to be nice and smooth, like a lady be. For that special touch a nice bit of veneer can be ironed on t' the top edges of ya chest. If ye has been paying attention ye should have something like this on yer ship:

It be at this point that ye should have some fittings, ye need t' decide on ya method of locking the chest, ya hinges and ya handles. If any of these need holes making then now be the best time ta do it as the next part be the staining of the wood ta pirate colours! Yarrrr!

I be favouring the walnut stain, but ye nautical milage may vary. I went for a key lock as well which ye may be able to make out. Now if ye be impatient like me ye be moving straight on t' doing the fittings now, but ye should really be getting the wood nice and varnished at this point. Then ye be saving having to varnish around ye fittings. If everything be going right ye should be able to attach yer fittings t' ya varnished chest and get something a little like this:

Arrr! It be sight ta warm me black heart!

If ye be the right person, then ye be having a key like this:

Which be able to get the chest open. Ye be noticing the lid supported by the little chain:

Arr it be empty! A pirate be changing that fer the better!

Yarrr, that be far improved, lets be heading in fer a close up:

Ye can see the captain's log book, a bottle of pirate booze, the skull of me ex-worst enemy Captain Cutlass, a nice belt knife, a secret treasure map, assorted jewelery and lots of pieces of eight!

A right royal hoard!

I hope ye enjoyed me guide and I be wishing ye further fortune on ye travels.

* This guide ablely assisted by: Wayne of the Woods , Homebase , Skulls Direct , Dead Men Tell No Tales , Weapons Galore , Country Crafts , Hobbycraft , a few other local stores and eveyone else who helped me out with ideas, patience and secrecy.

May 2005

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