All entries for Saturday 15 April 2006

April 15, 2006

Fighting conformity… one field at a time.

Warning: Drunken entry. Contains excessive egocentricity.

Well then. Tonight I went out in Basingstoke with Dave, Simon & Johnny from college. It was fun; we went to bars, we drank beer, we tried (fairly unsuccessfully) to pull girls that were wearing not enough clothes and far too much make-up. All very normal and healthy activities for a bunch of 20 year old boys on a Friday night, I'm sure you'll agree (well maybe not "healthy" per se, but.. y'know.)

Annnnywho… as I live slightly to the east of the middle of nowhere any night out involves a certain amount of walking home afterwards, and this evening's walk took me past a rather secluded pond. The air was mild, the moon was full, and there was a thin layer of fog blanketing everything; so I decided it would be nice to sit next to the pond for a while and chill out to some Nick Cave. Hence I sat and listened to the second half of The Lyre of Orpheus alone in the moonlight.

While this was all very good and beautiful and relaxing, I couldn't shake the feeling that at any minute a spotlight would fall upon me from a helicopter and people would crowd around and shout "LOOK AT HIM! HE'S BEHAVING ABNORMALLY! SEND HIM TO THE NUTHOUSE!" and this paranoia got me thinking. While I'm quite sure that everyone else behaves in a similarly eccentric manner when nobody else is around, am I alone in feeling horribly paranoid and vulnerable when acting like this? Is this part of "The Wall" that Pink Floyd sang about that makes us feel like acting as individuals is wrong in some way? Or am I just an overly self-conscious nutjob? Who knows…

Feeling rebellious and individualistic I decided I would continue to fight the system by taking a detour home via a rather large field. Several hours later, after getting completely lost in a small forest, I was home. I'm not entirely sure just how damage I inflicted upon The System, but I've fucking ruined my new shoes.


April 2006

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