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January 14, 2009

Frantic Film January

I love award ceremonies. They bring us moments of superb over-acting from the likes of Kate Winslet and Halle Berry and give us the chance to have a good argument about the mistakes and the well-earned victories.

But I’m starting to hate the Oscars.

Hate with a seething passion.

The film industry – by which I mean the good film industry is so geared up to this schmaltzy nonsense that you can’t see a decent film between March and November any more.

For half the year you get There Will Be Blood, No Country For Old Men and Slumdog Millionaire. And for the other half you get Transformers, Harry Potter and Mamma Bleedin’ Mia.

In order to see all the films I actually want to see at the moment, I’m having to go to the cinema at least once a week. This week it’s a choice between Defiance, The Reader and Che.

It’s lucky I’ve already seen Slumdog and Australia or else I’d be doing nothing else this week.

Annoyingly, awards season also coincides with the return of 24 and Lost on TV. I’m likely to come out of January talking like a Yank, and saying nothing but ‘Dammit!’

Can they not spread them around the year a bit better? Valkyrie, for instance, doesn’t look likely to greatly challenge the other films at the Academy Awards. Couldn’t that have come out in the sleepy months of March and April?

November 06, 2008

Child–free films – How did it take this long?

Writing about web page

Vue Cinemas are to start running adult-only film screenings at their cinemas. Initially I thought they were going to start showing pornography, but further reading revealed this to be an even better idea.

From tomorrow, certain screenings of PG, 12A, 15 and 18 films will be for over-18s only.

Mark de Quervain (I kid ye not) from Vue said: “These screenings have been launched in direct response to overwhelming positive customer feedback obtained from extensive research studies and trials carried out over the past year.”


This rivals the election of some black guy as the best news I’ve heard all week.

The curse of the yob/chav/townie seems to be geographically-biased to the shittiest parts of Britain (I’ve lived in some of them, you see), but nevertheless I think this nationwide ban on yoof is generally a good thing.

All we need now is aptitude tests on entry so that adults-who-behave-like-children receive similar treatment.

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