November 15, 2008

Pudsey's crying on the inside

Children in Need: Great cause. Appalling television.

It really is cringeworthy. It has the feeling of a show that hasn’t budged an inch in twenty years. From dancing newsreaders (I feel sick just remembering it) to D-list soap stars singing worse than Daniel off of the X Factor, it’s a constant stream of bilge.

One of the better segments – Childrens’ Masterchef – was so rushed you didn’t have time to remember who was cooking what or even who the contestants were. But of course there was time afterwards for Terry Wogan (please put him out of his misery) to patronise the children and the two judges.

The Strictly Come Dancing segment was twenty minutes of ‘so what?’ and the only real highlight – Doctor Who was over so quickly you missed it when you blinked. Merlin was unspeakably bad.

I’m not a cold-hearted old sod – the actual charity bits inbetween were as moving as ever and were far more likely to get people to pick up the phone than celebrities defecating all over their careers.

Next year, can we not have some real entertainment? Does it even need to be a studio show? And for goodness sake scrap the local segments – I don’t think anyone cares what nonsense is going on in the ‘local’ (i.e. thirty miles away) shopping centre.

- 3 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

  1. Adam Westbrook

    I think your topline sums it up: “great cause. appalling television” 100% agreed.

    My personal bugbears were these:

    - the opening was just underwhelming: standard shot of TVC followed by clapping in studio and terry emerges…it totally lacked the spectacular an event like that should start with.

    - like someone on the guardian said on Friday, it’s all just full of celebrities plugging their own shit. McFly’s “charity” single soon emerged as a double A-side..of which I imagine they’ll take a nice slice of.

    - but the worst plugger was the BBC itself! I noticed the 6.30 regional news programmes finished early (after a 10 min segment on local CiN balls at the end), and I counted no fewer than 5 (yes 5!) trailers for BBC programmes. After that came a ‘coming up tomorrow night on BBC1’ which plugged 3 more programmes. The all the supposed entertaining spectaculars were plugs for BBC shows from the Doctor Who pvw to Strictly Come Whatever.

    - We’re all unimpressed by dancing newsreaders now. Back in ‘99 when Peter Sissons did Fatboy Slim it was new. Now every newsreader does somekind of showbiz nonsense on the side, so seeing them do Abba just don’t cut it.

    - And yes, Merlin was SHIT.

    I hope it’s not R.I.P. Pudsey, but this certainly was the slow painful death of the live telethon. Another example of dear old Aunty, actually showing her age.

    15 Nov 2008, 11:38

  2. Emma

    Just be thankful that your local updates didn’t actually take up 75% of the whole show – I couldn’t have told you who was even presenting the London show until about 9.30pm as all we had been treated to was 3 songs from the Stereophonics and an old lady putting her money down John Barrowman’s trousers.

    15 Nov 2008, 13:44

  3. Gotta love BBC Wales. Ruined my television-viewing life for a whole year.

    15 Nov 2008, 15:04

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