July 23, 2007

A year in Birmingham

I’ve been in Brum just over a year now, and its gone so fast and I feel like I haven’t accomplished enough. Need to make a list. Always helps…

May 25, 2007

Green green grass

Writing about web page http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/england/london/6687089.stm

I think Trafalgar Square looks much better covered in grass, but I wonder how long it will be before someone’s dog leaves a massive steaming heap of turd and the owner neglects to clean it up?

March 07, 2007

School days… the real ones, not the drunken night out.

I went home these past few days as it was my little brothers birthday, and much cider and beer drinking was needed as a result.

Whilst not drinking or eating I sorted through some old school books and paper from primary school, and I found that almost every planned story I wrote involved either witches or shrinking, or in one particualarly creative occasion I combined the two.

Speaking to friends it seemed that shrinking was the subject of some of their stories too, or meeting a dog.

I just wondered wether there was some popular book around at the time that inspired the creative talents of a young generation?

The witch influence definitely came from books. The Colin and Jackie Hawkins books in particular. I loved them. Monsters, Witches, Vampires and Pirates. And I always felt safe on the family visit to Irealnd because according to the Vampires book, the Irish Vampires didn’t drink blood, but ate shamrock.

March 02, 2007


I saw 2 ducks in the fountain in Victoria Square today. It made me laugh so much. I love ducks.

February 21, 2007

More advert stuff

This. by the way. is a nit-picking entry about nothing important.

In that Tres Emme advert (or however it’s spelt) that hairdresser guy voiceover says something along the lines of “clients ask me if all that heat ffries their hair. And I say ‘no’” Then as this is being said they cut to a close up of the hairdresser guy. He doesn’t say no. It looks more like a non-committal “nearghm” or a “nyermh”.

Yes I do watch too much TV. And its proably making me fat and blind .

February 19, 2007

Lost photos. Nooooooooooooooo!

After getting a shiney, shiney camera for Christmas I went a bit mad and took loads of photos, some good, some bad and some downright ugly. Hundreds of them.

Then as I went to show someone the snowfest that was Birmingham the camra told me it had a memory card error. Bollox.

Now I don’t know what to do because all the card readers I have tried refuse to accept that there is a memory card full of photos in it.

Does anyone know if my pictures are doomed to remain on the card or is there some super-dooper method to get my ugly pictures back? Should I just keep trying different readers?

December 15, 2006


We bought a little tree yesterday and decorations.

Some of the decorations are covered entirely in glitter.

Now I keep finding bits of glitter on me.

I’m sparkly!

December 01, 2006

Continuning the pigeon theme…

Follow-up to Pigeons… sort of from not a scientist

A while a go a pigeon came into the centre. He didn’t pay.

I saw the pigeon walking around the entrance to work, occasionally looking in… I think he wanted to learn things… so we shouldn’t have been surprised when it walked through the door and flew up to the top of the building. For several reasons it was decided that the pigeon couldn’t stay, so ideas were proposed the best way to get it.

Ideas suggested were the original Crewe catching method (not actually sure if it has ever been sucessful), talking to the pigeon in the same “coo coo” way (I think they were from different parts of the country), tempting it with bread on a plate (pigeon was a fussy eater), throwing bread towards it, throwing plastic starfish to try and scare it away (he was fearless), or hiring a falcon(bit difficult at short notice).

Eventually they called rentokill… who magically solved the problem…

November 29, 2006

pigeon poo with your drink?

Follow-up to Creweites and their pigeon catching ways from not a scientist

Pigeon poo is apparently very good for plants as it is very nutritious.

At Shrewsbury railway station I saw a guy drinking his coffee/tea out of one of those styrofoam cups. As he moved his cup away and began to look for when his train was, a pigeon on one of the beams above him released an arse-load of shite, that landed in the centre of this fellas drink.

Some of the drink slopped out of the cup and onto the mans hand, causing him to look at his drink. Then he looked up. He saw the pigeon, looked down at his cup… looked up…looked down… and from where we were sitting you could see the realisation dawn. Muttering to himself, probably about how much he hates pigeons, he threw his drink away deciding that despite it being rich in nutrients it was not for him.

November 28, 2006

Creweites and their pigeon catching ways

Follow-up to Pigeons… sort of from not a scientist

On one of my many train adventures, I got talking to this auld fella and it came up that I was from Crewe. He got to talking about the only person he’d ever previously met from Crewe was in a factory sat with a box propped up on a stick, above some bread, and some string tied to the stick… cartoon stylee, illustrated below. When he asked what he was doing he said he was trying to catch a pigeon that had flown into the building.
pigeon trap

Now I thought this was something that only ever happened in said cartoons or comedy films… but then I was told by boyf that he had seen some kids on his way to my house trying to catch some pigeons using the same method… so maybe it happens in cartoons and Crewe…

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  • This creme egg could have killed a man: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yL034uXkN5Q by Turtle Dove on this entry
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