Im attempting to compile a list of the most toe-curlingly awful records of all time (as this is a far more fruitful use of time than doing overdue essays). These records are so brazenly bad that they have earned a special place in my heart. I especially adore the ones that make you shift awkwardly in your chair in their sheer naffness. Their beauty is cracked, fragile, grotesque and thoroughly wondeful. Please suggest any howlers of your own, fabulous readers, this lot need company..
Je t'aime moi non plus, Serge Gainsbourg
,The heavy breathing classic, banned by a Britain with no sense of the tragic incompleteness of love, actually a bittersweet admission from a bruised heart of how 'lurve' without feelings is better as you're not vulnerable…hats off Serge, I love you, nor do I
Ive been to paradise, but Ive never been to me, Charlene
Quite possibly the most cringy song on the list. A super saccharine treatment of dark themes, dissatisfaction, domestic abuse and abortion. Yes it is horrible, but with a bleak sort of honesty and a 80's permed sense of hope.
Where Do You Go To, My Lovely? Peter Sarstedt
She sips her Napoleon brandy, but she never gets her lips wet. Sarstedt's subject is a Parisian girl about town with a shady past in the backstreets-quelle horreur. Another heinous crime against music, pervy, perplexing and plain awkward. I can look inside your head- run away run away.
All songs are throroughly recommended and are on DC++, only I do implore you to listen to them with headphones on to preserve any scrap of musical credibility