midnight snack–related curiosities

Reposted from an email I sent around a very long time ago:

Subject: midnight snack-related curiosities
Date: Mon, 25 Sep 2006 15:00:14 +0000

Last night I felt rather peckish and decided to partake of some post-bedtime nourishment. Unfortunately, I was limited in my choices of what to eat by the fact that nobody had gone out to buy food for a while. On the plus side, I made the following brilliant discoveries:

- Although it is normally impossible to smell one’s own breath, the consumption of enough raw onion makes this possible

- the more raw onion one eats, the less strong English mustard becomes. Enough onion enables one to eat whole tablespoons of strong English mustard without pain.

- the combination of Lea & Perrins and raw onion is unfit for human consumption, even if you like both of the above individually

- the tastes of raw onion and peanut butter CANCEL OUT PRECISELY. In short, peanut butter spread onto some raw onion is TASTELESS.

- lastly, the aftertaste of lots of raw onion lasts well into the following morning.

: 10 Sep 2007 13:17 |  Comments (0) |  Report a problem