April 02, 2006

Trust

Trust is a complex thing, so long to establish, so easy to lose.

A general question, trying to find out a consensus here.

Can you ever trust someone who cheated on you? Does it depend on the level of cheating. Or is that it, one strike and they're out?


- 8 comments by 1 or more people Not publicly viewable

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  1. Depends, I'm afraid.
    Very much up to the person in question.
    Also depends on the level of cheating.
    A friend of mine thinks that a sober kiss is far worse than drunken sex. I can see her point too.

    02 Apr 2006, 13:12

  2. Had a thought the other day. Is it better to be in a relationship where one party is mentally (not physically) cheating, i.e. thinking about other people or contemplating cheating, or one where one party once (probably under some sort of influence) cheats physically but regrets it deeply forever? Hard to call.

    The reason for posing this is less hard to call – if the cheater feels regret or remorse then they are worth another chance only if you feel that it would be wise for you. Remember you have to think about your own life first and foremost, and do so in the hardest way, dispassionately. Do what's right for you.

    Obviously if the cheater feels no regret then leave them.

    02 Apr 2006, 14:37

  3. Cheers Gavin, can see the point, was basically sober kissing, so that's not exactly good.

    Thanks Holly, unfortunately she does feel regret, as far as i can tell, but I just don't know how I can tell what is the truth any more. Its so hard to make a decision dispassionately, since I love her, and she says she loves me. We initially broke up because she needed time to herself after being in a series of relationships. However, she says she would like to get back with me after I finish uni and she has sorted herself out.

    Then I found out about this stuff. , so I really don't know what to do, just feel so confused

    02 Apr 2006, 18:06

  4. think she might be subconsciously testing your limits? see how much you need her, trying to indirectly change how you treat her, that kind of stuff?

    02 Apr 2006, 22:59

  5. Could be, but I've been totally honest with her all along, so it'd be kind of annoying to say the least. As far as i can see there's no problem in how I treat her, I've had no complaints, everyone said we were a good couple, including her work colleagues who'd never met me, and her mum.
    It's all just kind of messed up

    03 Apr 2006, 00:26

  6. some girls secretly want a bad-boy so they can rebel against their loved ones through being with him..

    03 Apr 2006, 12:37

  7. zoe

    ONE STRIKE AND THERE OUT! fukin aint worth it

    04 Apr 2006, 16:06

  8. laura

    :( im sorry

    10 Apr 2006, 00:13


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